CHOOSING YOUR REFLECTION TITLE: A Light Nod to the 80s - Anna Keizer & Derek Dehanke DURATION: 41:51 Getting married is an event that holds a different meaning for everyone. For some, itÕs based on religious traditions, and for others itÕs a validation of an earlier choice they made to live with that special someone they love.Ê Hi, IÕm Lauren, and welcome to Choosing Your Reflection; a series of discussions that reflect upon the reasons we have for choosing our wedding day outfits.Ê Our guests are diverse, but they all share a common journey.Ê As they share their stories, theyÕll help us unravel the mystique that exists around choosing that special outfit, and what they learned about themselves along the way. Lauren: Anna Keizer and Derek Dehanke are the married co-hosts of 80s Movie Montage, a podcast they were inspired to do because of their wedding theme, which they call a light nod to the 80s. I'm so happy to have you both here today! Anna: Thank you for having us Lauren! Derek: Thank you! Lauren: I have so many questions but the first one is, why do you like the 80s? Anna: Well, I guess itÕs just, you know, nostalgia. Derek: Yeah. Anna: Simpler time. We both grew up on those films. And, you know, it just is a really interesting era of cinema. I have my educational background in film. And you know, upon meeting Derek, we just had that common love. And, you know, as far as the wedding goes, to be clear the actual outfits were not inspired by the 80s. ItÕs probably the one part of the 80s that is fine to leave in the 80s! But we you know, had our music and our decorations, party favors that kind of thing inspired by it. Derek: Light nod! Anna: Exactly! I, you know, love weddings. They're beautiful. I feel like sometimes they're a little cookie cutter. And I just wanted something a little different. You know they can be absolutely gorgeous. But I didn't want the traditional, you know, floral centerpieces for each table. We instead commissioned these two brothers, artists to create these like couples of the 80s from movies, and those were our centerpieces. Some are more traditional, you know, we had like Han and Leia from Empire Strikes Back. But then we also had Jake and Elwood Blues from the Blues Brothers, you know, so that kind of thing. We just wanted something that was a little bit different to maybe make it a little bit more memorable. Derek is that fair to say? Derek: Yeah, no, I think that's exactly it. And a lot of our guests were also from that era and also enjoy the nostalgia and a lot of the movies from that time period. So we thought it would just be fun. And part of the centerpieces not only was, you know, the fun of going through these movies that we love and trying to think of what characters to work with for the centerpiece, but then putting together the tables and trying to decide ÒOh, we can't not put these people at this table with the people from Ghostbusters because they are huge Ghostbusters fans!Ó So we were able to kind of have friends and family at tables where they would get the most fun out of it. So I think that's my sense is we just wanted to make something Éwe wanted this to be something where everyone just had a really great time and, you know, got up and just the sign that announces where each person will be sitting and how the tables are all set up was just kind of like that first look for everybody. And it seemed like everybody really enjoyed it. I choose to believe that everyone loved it. Lauren: I think it sounds so fun! And I wonder did you theme the music too, because clearly, you themed the tables, and you didn't have your outfits, which we will get to. But did you theme your music as well 80s? Or was it also just sort of a mix? Anna: I would say yes. Well, the short answer is yes. I would say that probably 80% of our songs É Derek: Oh, was it É was that on purpose? Eighty? Anna: Oh, I didn't mean to say it that way! But it is probably accurate to say that about 80% of our songs were from the 80s. I mean, we wanted to mix it up a little bit. And, you know, we had an amazing DJ who we collaborated with, he was super open to the idea. I think he probably was maybe the one to suggest ÒLet's throw a couple more, you know, current songs in there.Ó And so that was probably his suggestion. Derek and I would have been totally fine with all 80s. But yeah, I mean, and again, it just kind of like what you were saying, Lauren, it speaks to just the funness of that era, very distinct in terms of music. And again, just something that like some of those songs are really close to my heart and Derek's heart because of, you know, us growing up with them. So that was another component of it. It just makes us happy to hear them. Lauren: So since you guys didn't have 80s themed outfits, could you tell me about why you didn't? And obviously, other than the fact that the 80s wedding outfits are, you know, questionable at minimum but, and then what you did decide to wear? Anna: Sure. I mean, I guess as much as I love that era, I put it É I guess at the simplest terms wanted to feel pretty that day. And I didn't think that an outfit inspired by the 80s Ð not to disparage you know, all the beautiful, beautiful, brides of that time Ð but you know, we're between 40 and 30 years since and styles have evolved. And I just didn't think that that would fit. And I did É I guess to be honest, as well, I felt like that would maybe be pushing it into like campy zone. And, you know, I didn't want that. I wanted people to take the wedding seriously. And so that for me is the reason why that really wasn't É I don't even know É Derek was that even really a conversation? I don't know if we really even talked about it. Derek: No. And I think like conceptually, we knew that we wanted É like when we like kind of jokingly use the phrase the light nod it's because we generally were putting together a modern wedding. But to the extent that there were aspects of that wedding that we could have fun with, that we thought our guests would enjoy, that's where we like leaned more in that direction. So I don't think it was ever a conversation as far as our attire. It was just ÒOh, we have to do a centerpiece. Wouldn't it be fun if we did this?Ó You know, for the DJ we love this music, we know our friends do, so let's do that. And some of the little gifts were just throwbacks to, you know, candies and treats from that era. So I don't think it ever got to that point where we were, you know, trying to recreate a scene from The Wedding Singer. Anna: Great movie! I guess for me, I really went into the initial like dress hunt process without any finite idea of the style that I was looking for. I guess there were some things that I knew were not going to be for me. Like, I knew that probably like a mermaid style dress was not going to be my style of dress. I don't really know why this was something that was my one sticking point --- I didn't want something that was like sleeveless. I feel like that's a pretty pot. And for good reason. Women look beautiful in those styles of dresses, but I just didn't want that for myself. I wanted something a little bit different. And then as far as Derek goes, you know, Derek was extremely gracious, I think in, you know, letting me have some input in terms of like, what he was going to wear. I mean, I guess for me, the most important thing was kind of the, the color theme. Derek: Yeah, I think in É like that all made sense, because there was a color thing that that extended between bridesmaids and groomsmen. But you know, the different bridesmaids, different colored dresses, different groomsmen would have corresponding colored tie. And then, you know, my my talks was a lighter gray than the rest of the groomsmen. I think as far as the actual like cut of the tux that I got, it was just something that looked, you know, again, not a throwback of any kind, just here's, here's a modern tux that will look good and will not take attention away from your bride. Anna: And we also had a spring wedding. It was March 25th. And I felt that like probably, again, the one strange sticking point I had, as far as you know what the men in the wedding were going to wear is that I felt like black was just a little too extreme for like an outdoor spring wedding. And so that was kind of the one thing that I was hoping Derek would be on board with. I was certainly not going to, you know, if he felt really strongly that he wanted to be in a black suit, then of course, I would defer to him because that's what he's wearing and he gets to make that final say. But I was É that was just the one thing as far as like the men that I was hoping he would not want and it all worked out. Derek: Yeah, I felt like the all black suit would be difficult or challenging from a couple different perspectives. One, it did feel like it would be really formal, and like, perhaps overly so. And then I think we would have had less ability to have much of any difference between my talks and the groomsmen would be a little bit more difficult to achieve. So having like the different shades É Oh my God, I almost talked about Shades of Gray. And I do not want to say that! But having the different tones made a little bit easier to like, get the aesthetic that we were looking for. Lauren: So clearly, you had a vision for both of your outfits. Was there a communication between you two about each other's outfits beyond just you know, colors? Did you see them beforehand? And did you want to see them beforehand if you hadn't? Anna: I mean for me, Derek É Derek: I showed you, yeah. Anna: Yeah. I didn't go with or anything like that. When the men got fitted or even just selected their suits. But yeah, Derek, I think you came home and showed me pictures. Derek: I did because mostly I do not trust my own sense of taste in clothing. So I yeah, I wanted you to have a look. On the other hand, I very much have faith and confidence in what you ultimately picked. And you were beautiful so I never really had a concern with that. But I was deeply concerned with picking something myself where I would have seen it and gone ÒOh my God!Ó Anna: No, I mean, he did great. He looked great. Probably I would say, as far as he's concerned Derek, would you say that we had more of a conversation around your shoe wear than your actual suit? Derek: Yeah, I didn't want to wear I mean, the tuxes that we got we rented and they usually throw in dress shoes that will give your feet blisters within 30 seconds of putting them on. So we looked at Vans and Airwalks. And we ended up going with Airwalks which were not really the most comfortable shoes themselves but still much more comfortable if you're going to be on your feet all day then the dress rental shoes. I thought they look cool. They were they were fun. Anna: I think they looked cool, too. And as far as like my accessories, definitely, I just chose according to what I thought would work with my dress, which had no 80s connection. So if anything, actually because my you know, engagement ring and wedding band are rose gold. And so that actually was more of the common thread with my accessories. I had, you know, this kind of pearl clip for my hair that also had like rose gold in it. I had a belt added to like, like a little rhinestone belt added to my dress that had rose gold in it as well my I wore kind of like a Grecian sandals. And so that also had rose gold. So that was kind of more the common theme for the actual outfit. Lauren: What is it about the decision of those outfits that you made that make them more about you? What's the story you're trying to tell because clearly having an 80s themed wedding gives you as a person, as a couple, as a stepping out transition, a very distinct look of we're not going to follow traditional molds, we're going to do something that's more us. So I want to know how that translates to your outfits as well. Anna: Yeah. And I mean, for me, I think with the decorations and party favors and music, that was a way for us to kind of establish like the tone of the wedding that we wanted. It already was going to be somewhat on the casual side. I mean, we're in Southern California, it was an entirely outdoor wedding. Even our reception. We were kind of in É it's kind of like this glass structure. So you still felt like you were outside. And so i Derek: It was a giant gazebo! Anna: Yeah, thank you, Derek. Yeah, that's what I was going for. And those different elements were meant to kind of convey tone and also just show people that it's meant to be kind of a light hearted and fun affair. I think as far as my dress choice and accessory choices, I would say probably that my personal aesthetic leans a little bit more towards like boho and I definitely wanted to feel like É I'm sure other guests have said the same like you, you want to wear the dress, you don't want the dress to wear you. And so I wanted to make sure that, that that all kind of lined up. And as far as you know, fancier dresses go, I think they're just stunningly beautiful but I also wanted to be comfortable, sometimes they can be somewhat restrictive. I wanted to enjoy my day and not be thinking about what I was wearing so much. And so that all kind of fit together. Lauren: If you had to use a word or even a phrase, if you canÕt think of a single word to describe yourselves as a couple, I want to know if there's a word or a phrase that you could describe yourselves as. And then once you come with that word, I have a question as a follow up to that. Anna: Ooh, that is such a good question! Derek: It really is! Anna: Derek do you already have something in mind? I'm buying time. Derek: My one word is awesome. Anna: Or tubular, if we're É IÕm not gonna go there! Derek: ItÕs radical! Anna: Radical! I get É let's see. I'm cheating a little bit because I'm using more of a É like a couple of words, not just a single word, but like partners in crime, I kind of feel like that's our relationship where we, if it's okay to kind of expand upon that, just, you know, we have each other's back. We are partners. He is, I mean, another phrase, honestly, his best friend. he, he's my best friend. I go to him with everything. You know, there's been a lot of talking over the last year, because there's nothing else to do here at home. And, you know, I've told him that there's literally nothing that I feel like I can't say to you. And that makes me if I may, you know, very proud of our relationship, because I do feel like it's a strong dynamic. And, you know, during the actual wedding process, you know, he was great, because I will admit that I have a little bit of a type A personality. I like to kind of have things a certain way. And he was incredibly gracious. I mean, I certainly, and Derek if I'm not remembering correctly, you know, feel free to jump in. But I feel like I was being open to what was important to you to have in the wedding as well. Derek: Yeah, no other otherwise I think we worked really well together. And there's, you know, there are moments during the process where one of us is probably more anxious or nervous about a component of what we're trying to put together than the other. And I think we support each other really well. And I mean, you mentioned the last year. I've mentioned multiple times, and I will tell anyone who's willing to listen that I don't even know how I would have made it through the last year without you. Lauren: I really am curious if you're willing to share how you guys met. Anna: Absolutely. Well, you know, the very romantic way of online dating was, how that all came about. Um, you know, I guess I don't mind giving a shout out to the actual app. OK Cupid. Derek: It's different now. Anna: It's very different now I think! Derek: We saw some billboards for it, advertising it in a way that was not how it was advertised when we first used it! Anna: Not indicative of É so but at the time, you know, that's how that happened. And, you know, it was it was one of those things where, especially probably for both of us, you know, we were already both in So Cal, and it is an area where there's lots of people in entertainment. And sometimes you get a certain kind of person on an online dating app. And, and I just wanted to find somebody who was, I know this is gonna sound like the funniest way to put it, but like, normal. You know, somebody who wasn't going to be like É Derek: É and instead she found me! Anna: No, I just I loved you know, we're both originally from the Midwest actually. And so I really took to that, although we have competitive teams in our respective sports. And I saw him wearing a jersey of a team that I am not a fan of. And so that was something, that was a hard pill to swallow! Derek: Yeah, yeah, I saw I mean, I remember seeing you on the on that platform. And I had recently been to Chicago and saw that you had pictures of yourself at a Cubs game. And I just thought ÒShe likes baseball. That's awesome. She's from Chicago. That's she's probably super cool.Ó And that all that all played out be pretty much 100% accurate. Lauren: I really want to talk a little bit about your podcast. And I want to talk specifically about how it came to be. How you kind of got the idea. And I know that I sort of mentioned at the top that it was semi inspired by a wedding. But maybe I'm going to ask a good question, but this might be a bad question is whose idea was it? Anna: Ooh! Derek: Oh, it's definitely, it was definitely your idea. Anna: For sure, though? Derek: Yeah. Anna: YouÕre sure it was? Derek: Yeah. Anna: Okay. I mean, heÕs probably right. Derek: Yeah, no. You had brought up the idea of doing a podcast I don't know for like maybe, maybe a year. Like the idea now not like, on a super frequent basis. But the idea would come up occasionally and we just never really had anything to focus on. I don't know that we had like a, like, here's exactly what we would want to do but we think it would be fun to do a podcast. And then once it got to the level of when you got really serious, and you're like, ÒHere's what we're gonna doÓ then I also took it serious and started talking to whoever I could talk to, to find out what equipment we might want to have to like, have fun with it and make it sound reasonably good. Anna: Yeah, no, you're absolutely right. I think, I think before we really honed in on the idea of making it about 80s movies, we knew it was going to be about movies. We always knew that. And what É the reason why is because just you know, when we're sitting on the couch, and what usually watching something that we've already seen a couple times É Derek: We literally had The Goonies on before we joined this podcast! Anna: Before we joined you guys! And we noticed that for those films where we're really familiar with them, we would just kind of have this ongoing commentary while we were watching them. And because I mean, normally that would probably really annoy me if it was like the first time seeing something, but we just realized that for the for the types of films that we're really familiar with, which are typically 80s movies, that it was really fun to talk about them and just have that conversation while we were watching. And so yeah, we started thinking about the podcast, and I mean DerekÕs right, I was definitely probably the leader as far as like me, like having it happen. Um, the eighties thing I guess did, I mean, we talked about how well this is, this is the type of, you know, cinema we should cover. We obviously already love it. We have lots of friends in our lives. You know, we happen to know just a lot of people, you know, to varying degrees who work in the industry and entertainment and that they would want to come on the show and discuss these different movies. Derek: No, I think the addition of like having guests on, once we became more comfortable with that component of it, because at first we were just trying to figure out that the technical aspects of putting it together at all. And once we got comfortable with that, we figured out how to add in a guest. And that's been one of my favorite parts about it. Anna: Yeah, we've had, well, probably up to this point, maybe technically one person who was actually in our wedding party, a good friend of ours, but we've had a lot of just really great friends. And we've met some new friends along the way too. Lauren: Semi going back to the 80s topic because I'm just fascinated is do you guys have a favorite 80s movie? Do you É like do you ever have a conflict over which is the best one? Like maybe I'm asking the wrong question. Anna: Controversial! Okay, for me, actually, Derek just mentioned it that The Goonies is one of my all time favorites. I just adore that movie. And obviously by no stretch is it a perfect movie, but it's just so fun! I think in some ways, this might sound kind of corny putting it this way. But I think in some ways, the energy and the tone of that movie, in some ways mimics kind of what we had for the wedding. We just wanted people to have fun and you know, have a great time. And I mean, at some point The Goonies or not having a great time! Derek: Yeah there was no, there was no pirate treasure involved. Anna: There was no pirate treasure at the end of our wedding! But, but I do love that movie a lot. Derek I actually don't know if I know what your absolute favorite 80s movie is. Derek: Yeah, I don't think I have one. I have a lot of É I have a lot of favorites. I have a lot of movies that I love but my answer to that could change depending on what day of the week it is. Right now because we just recently watched and like covered it. But The Dark Crystal is one of my favorites just because it's such a unique movie that I don't know. Well, I want to say I don't know that it would be made now but then Netflix didn't make a season of it. To see how that would go. But I really love that. They're just a lot of É man I love Top Gun. There are a lot. There are a lot. I can't answer that with just one. I can't do it. Anna: But to your other point, Lauren, there definitely are films that we do not feel the same way about. We've covered a couple of them actually on the podcast. And you know, my whole thing is that I think it's great for people to have different opinions. I think that's one thing É and I apologize if I'm getting just a little bit too far off track. But I think that something with social media is unfortunately become just way too common is people getting really nasty and really angry with each other over something that should just be fun and something that should be enjoyed. It is 100% okay, if you don't like something I do, or if I don't like something you do, we don't have to get into a fight about. Derek: Oh! I just thought of my favorite. Anna: Yes. Derek: It's The Blues Brothers. Anna: Oh, yeah. Yeah, I did know that. Okay. And then, like I said, that was one of the couples, quote couples that, you know, we featured at our wedding and the poster that we had where, you know, everybody's names were listed for their different tables at the top of it. It does say ÒWe're on a mission from GodÓ as a line from the movie. So that's how É Derek: Which I wonder how some people took that line if they werenÕt as familiar with the movie. Anna: If some people didnÕt know that was from the movie, theyÕd be like ÒWhat É?Ó Derek: We were definitely not going for any over the top religious tones with it! Anna: Yeah, I wasn't really that. But, you know, like on the podcast, a couple of the films that we've covered like Bloodsport, that's definitely a Derek film! Derek: Oh God, I do love that movie! Anna: The really great friend that we had on we talked about Transformers The Movie. That is definitely their movie, not something that I grew up with. Derek: That was his favority more than mine, but I do love that movie. Anna: Yeah, so I know I'm picking on you, Derek. I don't know if there's been any, any films that have been more my movie than your movie. Derek: I think Dirty Dancing. Anna: Dirty Dancing. Yes, you're right. Yep. Yep. Dirty Dancing would definitely be one. Derek: It was a fun movie and I liked seeing Jerry Orbach I think? So anything with him is É Anna: Yeah. Yeah. And I love John Hughes, all the John Hughes movies. You probably got more than you bargained for Lauren! Lauren: No, I love movies. I worked in the industry. My fiance works in the industry currently. So you're talking to the right person about movies? I'm gonna ask another movie question. And it might be maybe more difficult or maybe it won't be. I don't actually know. So do you have a favorite movie that involves a wedding? And extra points if it's an 80s movie that involves a wedding É Anna: Oh, my goodness É Lauren: É because apparently I'm keeping track of points on that. Anna: That's a great question! I kind of honestly have a cheat answer because it's The Wedding Singer. It obviously isn't an 80s movie, but it is set in the 80s. And I just love the humor of it. It is you know, Adam Sandler is a brand of actor that people can be a little divisive about. I think he, you know, walks that line really nicely in The Wedding Singer. So it's one of my favorite performances of his. Of course, I think Drew Barrymore is amazing in it. I love her in that film as well. IÕm trying to think of though, like, you know, a legitimate É Derek: I mean, I can think of 80s movies that have weddings, but I don't necessarily love the wedding. Like, I love the Princess Bride. And there's a wedding in it. Anna: Yeah, it's a great answer. Derek: Yeah, or even Beetlejuice almost has a wedding. Anna: Almost. Yeah. Yeah, it is kind of funny that the couple films you've brought up are like weddings under duress. Derek: Sixteen Candles. Anna: That's true. Jenny's wedding is a really fun part of that movie. Okay, good job. Yeah, I didn't É none of those came to mind for me. Derek: That's all I got. Lauren: No it's funny. We had, we had another fellow podcaster on maybe few months ago, his name is David Luzader and he does a couple of podcasts. But we talked about weddings in pop culture with him, not specifically about the 80s. And we talked about like comic weddings. And the reason I'm bringing this up is because you mentioned that you've mentioned all these weddings in duress. And that's so like, the opposite in in comics is that like, if you have a wedding, you know, it's like, you know, this isn't going to end well. You know walking in that it's that negative thing, whereas in a lot of films, it's usually the opposite. It's not always in duress. So it's interesting that the ones you've mentioned sort of fall into that category. Derek: They all are. Yeah. Anna: I mean, you know, that's, that's a whole conversation as well about how weddings are depicted in movies and how they can maybe sometimes give an unhealthy view of what that event should be. You know, I think that that does carry over sometimes to real life where just so much focus is put on that particular day instead of the marriage as a whole. And so, that definitely could be a conversation to be had about, you know, the, the societal impact of that. Lauren: If you had to pick something that's toxic Ð we don't have to go deep into that that conversation Ð but is there something that you could immediately like think ÒOkay, here's the topic that usually is used in these weddings that's the most toxic to a relationshipÓ considering you guys are very happily married. Anna: Um, I think, you know, actually one movie that I'm thinking of which happens to be an 80s movie. And I do love this movie Mystic Pizza, if you're familiar. And so it's actually a kind of a role reversal. Where if I'm remembering correctly, because it's been a it's been a minute since I've watched it, but Vincent D'Onofrio is wanting to get married. And it's his girlfriend who keeps saying no. And I think that one thing that I think that that's kind of a common trope, where it's interesting to me where I think it all boils down to and I know this is a very movieish thing where there's just a lack of healthy communication, where one person's just saying ÒYes, yes, yes.Ó The other person's saying ÒNo, no, no.Ó And they don't actually have a conversation about why they feel the way they do. Which then creates the crux of the conflict in the movie. And I know that that's what movies are, you have to have some kind of conflict. But I think that what I'm generally speaking, there's kind of this ultimatum, that's usually put out there by one person in the relationship. Often it's the woman, you know, where she's like, ÒYou don't really love me, if you don't want to marry meÓ or, you know, whatever the case may be. Definitely, I think that that is a very toxic trope to put out there, where that's not the basis for a healthy relationship, where you're forcing one of the one of the people in it to do something that maybe they're not ready for and not actually having a conversation with them about why they may not be ready for it. So that's the one thing that comes to mind for me. Do you think differently Derek? Can you think of É Derek: Oh, no, I think you touched on it with the communication. And then there's always this trope of that this imbalance between the couple as far as who wants to get married, who doesn't want to get married, the communication, the ÒWeÕll make it work.Ó So like, these couples too often comedic effect, in some way, are trying to overcome these obstacles when it's like really obvious to the audience. And that's, I guess, the joke that they're not even really a good couple or meant to be married. And so by the end of the movie, they happily end up with somebody else or apart. And that's É man, you should know by then! You shouldn't be going down that road. Lauren: Yeah! No, I think those are so É it's so true. And I appreciate you guys sharing those with me and I É obviously, that's not an issue you guys have thankfully, and I want to sort of wrapping into this film idea of not being toxic in our weddings and trying to take those, you know, tropes out of the real world, out of reality, which they don't usually exist, but they can because of the influence of those films. If, and this, again, might be a fun little weird question but If you had your wedding to do all over again, and it was more like a film than it was an event, who would you have direct your wedding as any major film director? Who would you choose? Derek: That's an amazing question! Anna: Oh wow! That's an amazing question! Um, yeah! I don't know why this is the first person who came to mind because honestly, I don't think I would want him to direct our wedding. But because of his competence, you know, initially I'm thinking of like one of the greatest like Martin Scorsese. But now that I'm thinking about it, because you know, he does a lot of pretty dark, violent kind of work so É Derek: Well obviously, Robert De Niro and Joe Pesci are now going to be in our wedding. Anna: But you know, what? You know, who actually might make a great director for a wedding is Steven Spielberg. Derek: That's exactly É you stole my answer. Anna: Oh IÕm sorry! Derek: No that's okay! I'm glad. Anna: Um, but because I'm just thinking about, you know, obviously, he's still working to this day. But some of my most cherished films of his, you know, came out in the 80s. I mean, I adore Raiders of the Lost Ark and that sort of thing. And again, that's like, maybe not the vibe that you want to have for a wedding. But I think he you know, he has a more lighthearted touch. You know, E.T. is a great example of him, you know, telling a story that is, you know, from a child's perspective and a light hearted perspective, although there's some, you know, moments of darkness in it. Yeah, I think he would be a great choice. Not too tall of an order getting Steven Spielberg to direct your wedding! Derek: And when we've talked about some of his works from the 80s. I know that, you know, you mentioned E.T. and also to some extent we talk about Poltergeist. I think when I talk about just the way that the movie looks and the look and feel of the family, there's like this authenticity, to how you just see the home. And so I would want him to be able to put that touch on a wedding production. That's what I would like to get out of it. If we were and I don't think it's gonna happen. But if it is, if we could get that I'd be I'd be willing to have that conversation. Anna: I'd be open to renewing those vows with Steven Spielberg at the helm! Lauren: That sounds so fun! And I love the answer Steven Spielberg. I don't think I would have answered that. I don't know what I would have answered to be fair. So mine would probably be some Quebecquos like niche creator and it would be very sad and moody. Anna: Like Lars von Trier or something like that É Derek: Oh God! Lauren: With fire and some really dark things on a soundstage with tape, you know, just some weird stuff! But I have another question. And it's semi in the same vein and probably a little harder, and it's okay if you guys don't have a direct answer. To be honest, I don't have an answer to this question for myself, because I don't know enough costume designers. But if you do know any sort of costume designers or even a costume style, necessarily, if you don't have a name of someone, who do you think you would want to design your wedding? And what design elements if you don't have a name of someone would you want incorporated for costuming? Anna: I'll probably take this question if that's okay, Derek. I feel like I might have a couple. Derek: Please proceed! Anna: Okay! Um, so two people came to mind in one actually is a costume. I mean, she she's still working. But Marilyn Vance, she worked on a lot of john Hughes's films. She's also very well known for being the designer behind like Pretty Woman, which has a couple of very iconic outfits in it. And so I think that, you know, she, she did a lot of really great work in the 80s and 90s. I think, though, that, you know, given that we're in 2021, maybe she could come up with an aesthetic where the actual attire could be a light, not to the 80s. But it still feels like it fits for modern day. I mean, she's obviously much more talented than then I could ever be in terms of like, figuring out how that would work. But um É so that's a possibility. Patricia Field, who was the costume designer on like Sex in the City, so more modern, I think that she might be able to, like, lock in a little bit to that like boho aesthetic that I was talking about. And then actually just, she's coming to mind because of the last one that we covered for our podcast, Edith Head who was the great. I mean, no comparison can be had with I'm sorry, with Edith Head. And so I think those three women might actually do a really great job together. I can't imagine anybody who could do a better job! Lauren: You got all three of those women, youÕve got Spielberg, you know, COVID goes away, you got to do your vow renewal! You just gotta call them! Anna: Yeah, no, absolutely. It's really just that simple! Derek: It's a start! Anna: If I may just like a little bit of advice for anybody who's like currently going through this process, I know it's gonna sound somewhat contrived, because I'm sure people have heard it before but really, and truly, you know, whether your engagement is a couple months or a couple years, there's going to be stress that comes with it. It's just É it's part and parcel, I think there is a little bit of an acceptance that needs to come with that. But then also, you know, just to remind yourself that like, yes, you want this to be a beautiful day, you want everybody to be happy, you want to look beautiful, you want all those things, but this is just one day in a lifetime that you're going to have with the person you're marrying. And, you know, I'm so thankful to Derek because he did see me pretty stressed out at times. And he was the person who absolutely walked me back from that edge, that cliff. Derek: You plan it the best you can. And on the day of you just try to enjoy and appreciate every second of it. Because once that day's done, then that's it. And yeah, you know, like Anna said, you'd have the rest of your lives to live together. So you want to plan and try to put together the best wedding that you can, but also, you just want to have a celebration and what you're celebrating is the start of that new life. Anna: I mean, that's pretty much it. I mean, I'm again, just so thankful that he's my partner and the person that I you know, walked through that phase in my life with and that I'm currently walking through life with so Derek: Oh, we didn't talk about my cufflinks. Anna: Oh, go ahead. Derek: Yeah, no, they were just regular cufflinks. ThatÕs it! Lauren: I'm glad we talked about the cufflinks! I was really worried that that wouldnÕt talk about them. Anna: That would have been a shame! Derek: Someone might have wondered! Someone might have said like, ÒWait a second. What about this? What about the cufflinks?Ó They're just they're just the regular ones. Lauren: Well, thank you again, so much, both of you for being here for sharing your stories with me. And for all of our listeners who are here if they wanted to find your podcasts and you guys where can they find you? Anna: Yeah, thank you for asking. You know, 80s Movie Montage is the name of the podcast. Probably if you Google it, you know, it'll pop. I think we're on probably most of the different platforms Apple, Spotify, Pandora. And then you know, if you were interested in like, kind of the social media part of it, you know, we have our Facebook and Twitter and Instagram page. And it is the same handle for all three, it's @80smontagepod, and then 80s -8 Ð 0 - s. So that's where you could find us if you're so inclined.