147 Asia Suler
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Libby: Hi, I'm Libby Bunton, and on October 25th I'll be co-leading an incredible group of women through a six month journey of unbecoming with Monica. So I thought I'd hop on here to introduce myself and just say hello and tell you that you are not alone. What do I mean by alone? . What I mean is that feeling of not speaking up when you know something is wrong.

The feeling of being at war with your body or forcing yourself through when you are so exhausted or even thinking you're ungrateful for not being at peace with your life or even for wanting more. The good news and the bad news is that this is the experience of most of the women we've talked to. , the feeling of being alone in a room full of people because of these isolating thoughts and our conditioning that teaches us to look everywhere, but inside of ourselves for the path to liberation.

Monica and I have both lived through that hell, and we've dedicated ourselves to helping women reveal the unseen forces that keep us in this personal bondage that keep us disconnected from our desires, our magnificence, our beauty, and our unbid. Monica and I have both lived through that hell and dedicated ourselves.

No, I'm starting that one over again. , Monica and I have both lived through that. Hell. And we've dedicated ourselves to helping women reveal the unseen forces that keep us in that personal bondage that keep us disconnected from our desires, magnificence, beauty, and unbridled self-expression. My own personal journey of unbecoming helped me dismantle the inner prison.

I had actually built to protect myself and to survive in this insane society that suppresses and denies the feminine at every turn. What made it possible was a sisterhood of women who were with me, who could see me as I came undone and relate to me, and most importantly, they did not try to fix me. As I came out on the other side, the me I revealed was my true self and the woman that I had always wanted to be.

So if you're having a bodily response to these words, I want to remind you that your body knows the way, even though you've been taught to disregard. , I want to personally invite you to join us in this journey of unbecoming because when you know it's time, you know it's time. And by the way, I have every intention of making you laugh your ass off, find your deep inner humor, and have this be an experience like no other.

So now you've heard a little from me and I'd love to hear from you. to find out if this journey is a fit. Just sign up for a call to learn more with Monica and me at sign up dot Join the revelation.com/unbecoming that sign up. Dot join the revelation.com/unbecoming. I cannot wait to welcome you to the sisterhood and to be there as you reveal the truth of who you really are.

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Monica: Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of the Revelation Project podcast. We are the heroes on our own journey, and the traumas that come to shake our lives are the very things that hand us our greatest gifts, the assignments of healing that ultimately teach us how to turn around and help others.

Each one of us is born inlaid with gifts whole as a geode. Trauma helps us crack open so that we can find the crystals within today. My guest is Asia Sewer Are.

Today my guest is Asia Suler, who is a writer, teacher, earth, intuitive and ecological philosopher who lives in the folds of the Blue Ridge Mountains. She is the author of Mirrors in the Earth. Reflections on self healing from the living world, and she's the founder of One Willow Apo Carries an Appalachian grown company that offers handcrafted herbal medicines and educational experiences in herbalism.

Animism, ancestral healing and earth centered personal growth. Asia has guided over 20,000 students in 70 countries through her immersive online programs. With her writings and teachings. Asia helps people embrace their own unique medicine through a joyful engagement with the natural world. Please join me in welcoming Asia Suler.

Hi, Asia.

Asia: Hi, Monica. Thank you so much for having me. 

Monica: Oh my goodness. I have so many questions for you and I cannot wait to talk about this book.

I mean, first I just wanna say, and I said this before, but it just, I love your writing. You have such an incredible way of just using metaphor and your, just your vocabulary in the way that you. right about your own heartfelt experience, along with how you see the natural world touched me at such a deep level.

Thank you. 

Asia: Hmm. Thank you so much. I'm really taking that into my heart today. 

Monica: How long did it take you to write it? 

Asia: It took me 10 years. 

Monica: I love hearing that. 

Asia: Yeah. It took me 10 years, you know, in the beginning I had it really, it was more of just like a push, a nudge to write a book and I didn't know what it was about and I, and I kept starting these drafts and then discarding them and I was collecting these stories, the stories that are now in the book, but I just didn't understand the overarching concept or, or theme or what was you uniting it?

Though it took me probably three or four years of edging towards it. Backing away, edging towards it, backing away, until I finally understood what sort of the overarching concept was, which is this idea that learning self-compassion. 

Monica: Mm-hmm.

Asia: is a force of ecological healing. That, and that the earth is interested and invested in us.

Learning how to appreciate ourselves, see and understand ourselves because it's only through learning self-compassion that we can give our gifts to the world. And so once I understood, Oh, that's the journey I've been on 

Monica: Yeah,

Asia: that's, that's the journey I've been on. And that's, that's the overarching concept and each one of these stories of these revelations, really, that I had experienced with the living world.

And so once that came into play, You know, it was another four years of writing and then the publishing process, you know, takes a good bit of time. So yes, it all told, since I first started sitting down and trying to write this book, it's been 10 years. 

Monica: Oh, I love hearing that because I myself am writing and it, you know, I think I thought, Oh, you know, I'll just sit down and write a book.

No, it does not happen that way. At least for me and I too have been kind of collecting these stories and I've just really been in the process of giving myself so much permission to just have it take however long it needs to take. And I also really believe that we all have a story, uh, many stories to.

And so I love hearing that you just kind of collected them, you know, and you just kind of let it unfold. Let the, the meaning behind why you were doing it just kind of inform you. 

Asia: Yeah. And I think we live in a time where there's so much emphasis placed on the quick share. You know, the Instagram post that goes out the same day and sort of this turnaround of like, I've had an insight and I

sort of turn it into something that I'm immediately going to put out in the world share, um, which is beautiful and wonderful and there's so much value in the slower process in giving yourself this time and this space to digest and understand. And, you know, I. Love reading posts on social media, and I also love books.

That took a really long time to create and put together, and it's something that I know a lot of folks that I interact with feel like there's a, a book inside of them that really wants to be born. And it's something I, I like to remind people that it's okay to take that time because I think that. It's a healing for us on a personal and somatic level.

I think it's healing for our, our lineages and our ancestry to know it's okay to take time, that there's not this urgency, this sort of trauma response of pressure and needing to go quick and that giving yourself that time is honoring the depth of what's trying to come through. 

Monica: I love that. Yeah. And I also am someone who is a deep processor.

A lot of what I find in your work as well is this very contemplative way of. Processing what it is you're experiencing and seeing in its relationships in various forms. And so I really appreciated that as well. And I think sometimes we forget because of this world that you speak of , you know?

Asia: Mm-hmm.

Monica: Where there's, it's like, what world is this you speak of, you know, that we're part of every day. That's all about the sound bite and. Just quick packaged and easily processed and yet just doesn't work that way. And I think it's great for us to give ourselves permission to just sit with our thoughts, to really allow them to inform us and everything else that kind of comes into that space, which for me is what the Revelation project is really all about, is kind of this.

Ever unfolding this way that life reveals itself to us, That we're in this creative, co-creative process of reciprocity, of witnessing and receiving. It's just really been this beautiful way that the project itself has informed. 

Asia: Yeah. I love that concept too. Just the idea that these projects, books, creations, that they really are like our spirit guides and they come in to help us.

That's 

Monica: right. Learn and grow. That's right. They really are. They really do do that. Wow. Okay. So mirrors in the earth. Mirrors in the earth. I get chills when I say that now because it has so much meaning to me from reading your work. But when I first looked at it, I just thought, well, , what does that really mean?

Without giving too much away, cuz I would love for our listeners to read your book. First of all, how did you know that you wanted to title that and where did that whole thing come from? Like, mirrors in the earth? 

Yeah, the title was just always there for some reason. Um, once I sort of understood the larger context of the book, it was always there and it came so quickly that I, I thought it was a working title, , but it never changed and it just really was the, the title of the book and.

In the first chapter, there's a moment where I pick up a piece of Micah up from the ground, and in that moment I see and understand something that I had I hadn't seen before, which was this belief system that was so deep inside of me. I, I say it was stuck like a bur and I didn't even know it was there.

And it was this belief that a part of me thought I wasn't. Good. And I, I truly hadn't seen that. I had thought that before. And if anyone's seen a piece of mica, it literally looks like a vintage mirror, um, with these many different layers of mineral. And, and we're very mica rich here in the Appalachian mountain.

So there's a lot of mica embedded into the matrix of different rocks, but also just. Chunks of Micah that you can find in the forest. And I later learned more from a Chinese medicine perspective that, uh, Micah literally is considered to be a mirror that reflects back to us our divine goodness. Mm. And to me it was a beautiful.

Metaphor for understanding the way the earth works in relationship with us. So in psychology, there's this concept of mirroring. And specifically when we're very young, uh, in an ideal environment, our caretakers would mirror back to us our emotions, our talents, our strengths, the truth of who we are, our self esteem, and.

Unfortunately many of us didn't get the kind of mirroring that we really needed in order to see who we are clearly and, and, and with truth and, and benevolence. And yet the earth is apparent mirror that never forsakes us. You know, we as humans, Our children of this planet, and we were meant to grow up in relationship to the living world, to see ourselves through the living world.

And this doesn't mean that we project ourselves onto the living world as if, you know, the denizens of nature were objects. It literally means being in a relationship much like a, a child, is to a caregiver where the living world actively reflects back to. Who we are, our capabilities and and our goodness, and that we can return home to that relationship with the parent near of the earth at any time.

Because we are always here to be in that relationship. And, and that gateway is always open. And so when you return to that, that space of relating and connecting to the natural world, you will be shown who you are. You'll be shown how deep your gifts really go. And to me that's, that's sort of at the heart of the book is each chapter is.

Looking into a mirror is giving, giving people an opportunity to gaze into this mirror through a story of, of my own experiences, of seeing and recognizing myself through the living world and, and through looking in that mirror, really start to understand the truth of who they are. 

I love that. Okay, so, I am gonna read another little passage that really spoke to me because I love this.

I do love so much. There's so many little vignettes in your book where it's like you're gazing in the mirror, you know? And as it relates to like something that you've seen in nature. So here we go. We are told that we almost follow the same timetables of seed, plant tend reap and compost, but when our journeys don't conform to the larger cultural ethos, we feel is lost as the last oak leaf left on the tree to spin solo, it is worthy and good.

To live one's life by the rhythms of the natural world. But everywhere you look, you will see a spectrum of existence that thrives on the sheer diversity of timelines, micro climates, niches, the tiny shifts of daylight that make it so that a tree on the hilltop will act completely differently than the ones down in the cove.

And you're gonna have to pronounce this word for me. marcescent. Is that what it is? 

Asia: Yeah. You got it? Mm-hmm. . 

Monica: Okay. marcescent reminds us that we navigate our particular cycles of birth and death by following the rhythm of our own inter metronome, and that no matter how baffling that timeline might seem, it is adaptive, sacred, and filled with hidden wisdom.

There were so many times where I was reading your book that I actually felt this like permission and actually like tears would well up in my heart and in my eyes because I would think like, Oh my gosh, that's so true. And, and it, there was like this, Oh yeah, I forgot. You know, like, I forgot, like I'm allowed to do this in my own time.

And what I loved what you were saying in this whole little series was all about how. The body holds the wisdom. It's like we, our body knows the way. Like just trust your way. Just trust your body's way, you know? And I love that so much because, especially because. As women, we are conditioned to be so at war with our body.

We are conditioned to ask, What's wrong with me, what's wrong with me, what's wrong with me, over and over again. And the truth of the matter is that there is nothing wrong with me. You know, it's like sometimes when we look through the mirror of the culture, all we're gonna see is the brokenness because we're looking at the wrong mirror.

Asia: Mm-hmm.

Monica: it's, the culture isn't gonna reflect, but nature is that true mirror. And I just love that. It's like, no, no, no. Look at the, look at the mirror right next to it. You know? It's like, it's right here. Just stop looking in this other broken mirror. 

Asia: Yeah. Nature Deeply values diversity. Yeah. Diversity is what makes an ecosystem strong and resilient, and it's what brings beauty to the world.

You know, I write in that chapter about, you know, any anybody knows a beautiful garden, like I really spectacular garden is planned around this diversity of blooming in timelines. You know, we need the early bloomers and we need the late bloomers. We need the tulips, and we need the crisantos in the fall.

So just remembering. We are all different. And that difference is sacred and it's, it's important. And in that chapter in particular, I talk about this process of marsan, which is a very mysterious ecological process where a dec deciduous tree will hold on to its leaves throughout the whole wintertime. So you might have seen this with a, an oak tree or a beach tree where it's January and that tree is still holding onto. leaves, and it's something that ecologists don't totally understand. They know that there's a reason for it, that it's highly adaptive because it's been around for millions of years. The strategy, the leaves don't fall right until right in early spring, right when the new, new leaves are emerging. And yet it's something I think that the poetically minded person understands innately, that there is a inherent wisdom to the things that we hold onto.

There's a, a wisdom to our own inner. Timetables, our own timelines, our own seasons that we move through. There is not one season for release or renewal that we are each, you know, in some ways our own, our own globes spinning in this world and, and your own seasons are valuable and important and sacred.

And to give yourself that space and understanding and gentleness to know that there is a, there's a wider plan and there's, there's a, a beauty. To the cycling of your own seasons? 

Monica: Yeah, I mean, what comes up for me when you say that are, are the ways that I have in the past been like almost mad at myself? Like whether you stay in a relationship too long or you too long, I'm using air quote. Because what you're actually saying is that it's all for a reason. You know? And like those reasons may not be revealed in that moment, but when you look back, it's much easier for me to see now the wisdom of why I held on as long as I did in certain ways. And of course, you talk about this as it relates to trauma as well. And how our body innately and intuitively brings us to passages in our healing at just the right time. 

Asia: Yeah. You know, I've experienced this through, you know, my own work with my own trauma. That when it's time for that trauma to come up and be released, it's the right time.

And that there's a deep wisdom in the, the holding on that we do, you know, the definition of trauma. A Chinese medicine perspective is, is a moment where something, there's a charge that happens that's too big to be felt in that moment, and so a part of us kind of freezes and says, Okay, I'll deal with this later, , I'll unthaw this and move this energy through later when I have more capacity.

Because literally the charge is too much for us to experience in that moment. It would blow our circuits, and so the goal is when there's time and space and safety to do so. , you move that frozen blood, you get, you get it moving again. 

Monica: Mm-hmm.

Asia: but there has to be the right time and space for it. And so there's a deep wisdom to our body of knowing, okay, this is a time or phase of my life where I have the space or the safety to start releasing this.

And so to trust that the timing is right and that when we tried to rush things often it's, it's not quite right for our bodies. There, there isn't that, that spaciousness or that safety in order to do that, and it's such a. A rewrite of the cultural norms we've been handed to go, Okay, I'm gonna just follow my body's wisdom.

It's like we're literally told over and over again to overcome our body's wisdom, to to ignore it, to shove it away, to push it down, to circumvent it. You know, we're told to push ourselves past really what our body is saying we are available for. That's valued in especially American culture. And so it's a huge rewrite to say, Okay, what if I follow the wisdom of my body, just like I follow the, the natural seasons of the world around me, and I don't try to force or move anything.

I just let it happen. 

Monica: Yeah, I mean, one of the biggest revelations I think most women have in a coaching environment, especially when it comes to kind of this more holistic way of coaching proactively is kind of like, , you know, just that coming down into the body and you know, cuz there might be this, like what the mind says, right?

But then it's like, well, what does your body say? And what does your body know that's different from that? And. That seems to be the most challenging bridge for most women to cross is back into their bodies. And I have this theory that we have been living women in particular. It's like that our bodies became uninhabitable, like emotionally uninhabitable because we were kind of forced, just as you said, to kind of override all of its signals to the point where you literally have.

Psychological implosion or this bodily kind of exodus where you kind of explode up into your head and you just stay there disassociated for most of your life. And it's where we have learned to survive, you know, because that is obviously a very powerful theme for so many women is like this. You know, just like coming back into their knowing, their trusting, their sexuality, their, all of that, their intuition is, is all through the body, their emotion.

And it's a both, and it's, it's such a uncomfortable and beautiful process to get back to the body. . 

Asia: mm, yes. Absolutely both. And, and you know, I have to say that gotta love our bodies because they are allowed communicators, , they will often let you know when you're disconnected and telegraph that over and over again.

And, you know, obviously it's something I talk about in my book. But, you know, I, my, this whole opening really into this world for me came from being diagnosed with a chronic pain condition in my late teenage years called Vulvodynia , which is. Chronic pain condition of the vulva and pelvic bowl. And so very literally, I started having chronic pain in like the root of me and, and obviously it affected every area of my life, including my sexuality.

And it was a huge clarion call to realize the ways in which I had. Disconnected from my own body, you know, in large part due to trauma and being asked to come back in a relationship and sort of this sort of demanding call. And I, and I think now, I, I, I recognize, you know, my body is just a very loud and profound communicator.

And I, it tends to be that when I get, uh, disconnected or off my path, um, in some way, My body will let me know, you know, through chronic pain or chronic illness, both of which have been a big part of my journey. And so in that way it's like we have, it's almost like gravity. It will always bring us back down and it is really just up to us to surrender and let go and descend again into the body. And that's really when healing happens. 

Monica: Ah, it's so true. Loud and profound. Mind two sister, it's just like, My body always knows. My body always knows the way and just, and also just seeing, you know, the body's dis disease or ailments as an invitation, you know, to really get that. It's an invitation to lean in, listen to get curious.

I mean, it's not a popular sentiment, but , you know, it really is. I've found over and over again that that is, That is the calling. You said clarion call and it's so true. It's like when we become really disconnected, I find that that's when. Disease and or ailments really show up to call us back home. 

Asia: Yeah. And there's a deeper benevolence to that. You know, it's sort of like, one of the things I say is, you know, the message you need will never stop trying to be delivered, and that's a sign of how much you're loved. That, you know, the, the guides and, and the earth and all the wider, wiser beings will never give up on you.

So they'll keep sending that message in, in any way that they can. And it is a sign of how much you're loved. Yeah. And how, how much potential there is there in your life. 

Monica: Yes. And sometimes it's a sign of how thick you actually are. , that you, I'm just, I'm saying that about myself. I'm raising my hand because I'm just like, sometimes, you know, after I get the message, I'm like, How can you be.

Thick. You know, it's like that message was coming through and there are a couple I still don't get. I'm still kind of like, What is the message here? You know, I feel like I'm screaming out into the void. Is there anybody out there? Yeah. And of course it's not out there. It's like it's in here, Monica, Like the wisdom is actually in here.

Get quiet, lean in. Listen, it's more or less whether or not I have the, the wherewithal and the patience sometimes. The pace of life to actually give myself that time and space. So I think again, that's the other thing that we're always constantly trying ]to harmonize or balance, is this is this deep imbalance, which is how often we're kind of out here seeking versus in here being with what is.

All right. I have another, I have another passage that I just love so much, and it's called The Flower Scene by the bee. This particular passage also really, really spoke to me because I think it's true also for many, many of us that one of those kind of wounds is not feeling seen. Mm. And I know that was true for me.

So what would happen if you could walk through the world and know that you were being seen by the trees, the creeks, the hawks circling quietly. What if you knew for certain that you weren't alone? That the part of you that aches to rejoin the wider world is being called back to the fold. When we are seen, everything changes.

When we are seen, we become free to ourselves in our precious entirety. The disconnect we feel between ourselves and the community of the wider world is a sorrow at the center of our being. It is the wound unseen that we are constantly trying to feed, but the wound isn't bottomless and the balm is all around us.

The world not only sees us, but wants us to know that we are seen. 

Asia: Yeah. I think something I talk about in that chapter is that, you know, being seen as a, a human need, You know, we need to be seen for who we are. It's, it's. It's part of what makes us human. And yet so many of us feel like from a young age we were not seen, we were projected upon, or you know, we were ignored,

And what's been so powerful for me is realizing that there is always a place where I can always be seen in my entirety. And that's. With the living world. I walk out my door and I'm being seen, You know, and I, I talk in that chapter about, you know, having this revelation of, of realizing that all these times that I went out into nature and just felt invisible because of one thing or another in my life.

And all those times I was being seen by Nature , that the, the birds knew I was there and. Telegraphing that message deeper back into the woods so that by the time I entered the, the heart of the wood, literally every being knew I was there. This is a, a literal thing that happens with birds and bird communication and bird song.

Uh, the squirrel saw me pass, you know, the trees since my presence walking over their roots. And so to me it's just been such a healing balm to remember that. The Earth sees you. The living world sees you and cares for you, embraces you as a part of the fold because to nature you've never been separate.

You've never been apart. And so we come home to our belonging every time we step outside our door. 

Monica: Yeah, i, And also this just daring to shine because this other part that you say like, without being seen, how will the flower attract the bee? So I'm gonna go on with this for a. Without being recognized by those that surround you, how can you give your gifts to the wider community?

When you let yourself be seen for who you are, you become a flower for this world, a being who carries the seeds of a new beginning. There is no part of you that the earth does not know, and so there is no piece of you, no matter how hidden that is, unworthy of being seen. We must only let in the possibility that we are worthy of such belong.

Yeah, that's the crux right there. What is it like to hear your writing? Like it's reflected back to you . 

You know, so much of this was 

Asia: messages that came through for me. Mm-hmm. and really. Meant a lot to me and helped me in that moment. So hearing my writing back, it's, It can be an emotional experience for me because I'm still receiving Oh yeah.

Monica: These messages from the earth. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Well, I read this passage to my husband last night because we kind of have this joke with the dogs and in the. You know, toward the end of this piece you talk about open the door and watch your dog bounding up to meet you. Let their exuberant welcome flow straight into your bones.

And he's such like, always been like the animal whisperer. And I'm kind of like the reluctant dog owner sometimes. I mean, I love my dogs, right? But he's always kind of like wanting me to see how they love me. So much cuz I've been the one in our relationship. Like he's the one that's taught me about unconditional love.

I've been like the armored one, you know? And he's been like the open your heart, Monica, it's safe to come out. . So I read this last night like with tears in my eyes and he was like, true that. . 

Asia: I love that. 

Monica: I'm like, Yes, yes, it's true. . Yeah. It's just so, so beautiful. And this returning back to the fold. is really what self love is all about.

You know, I often kind of talk about this concept of we've kicked ourselves out of the garden, you know, and I think that that comes to us honestly based on our creation stories and the way that the modern world kind of micro doses, these messages of unworthiness to women our whole lives. And so I.

Really, really resonate with self love and self compassion being the portal. Everything kind of starting to work, you know? It was like the world didn't work until I got that, until I remembered that, until I remembered myself, and so it's like out. There we are so fractured. And I say out there as I'm pointing kind of to the modern world, but when we come back home and like to our soul, our soil, our earth, our body, the mirror of the earth is where we remember.

Yeah. 

Asia: Yeah. You know, I think that for all of us, this is a, this is the journey of our lifetime, right? This is, this is, this is the big journey. And, and I, you know, I identify as a, as an empath and a highly sensitive person, and for a lot of people who identify in that way, you know, a lot of. Value was placed on you, especially as a young person in your ability to step outside of yourself to over attune to other people and other people's needs.

And so it's a huge reversal to come back to this awareness of, oh, like. Me focusing on myself isn't selfish me going on this journey of learning self compassion. It's not taking myself away from helping other people or helping the world. It's how I learn to actually be of, of true service. That this is how I see and understand and give my gifts to the world to be willing to go on this journey of learning.

Self acceptance and, and self-compassion. And that took me a while to learn because you know, I think in general, women are also just socialized to care about other people's needs over their own. And that the moment we focus on ourself or our own journey, that that's coded as selfish and, and that's a bad thing, right?

It's bad to be selfish and. The reality is being full of yourself is incredibly important. That, you know, being full of yourself literally means you're allowing all of your life force to access all of your body that you are fully inhabiting the person you came to be. The person that your soul decided that they were here to be on this planet in this lifetime.

So you're fulfilling your soul's blueprint by willing, being willing to be full of yourself and allowing yourself to go on this deeply personal journey of self recognition and self fulfillment. And because that is such a powerful healing force for this world, the earth is deeply invest. And us going on this journey and is actively encouraging us to have the bravery and the allowance to just let ourselves go on that, On that journey, on that path.

Monica: I was with my son yesterday and we went to see a healer. And he was sitting in the chair in front of her and he was talking about, you know, some pain that he's been having with shin splints. And then she said, And is there anything else that you, you know, that you've been having trouble with or struggling with?

And he goes, Yeah, paying attention in school when I'm, when something happens or you know, I have a thought, it's really hard for me to pay attention to what's happening in school. And she said, And who said that what you're paying attention to in your thoughts isn't exactly what you should be paying attention to.

And he just sat there quietly for a minute and he looked at me and I smiled and I said, Kind of schoolish, isn't it? ? And you know, and I, I get that term, schoolish from Aquila Richards, who talks about the unschool. As liberation work and what you're talking about is very similar to me. It's like this idea of like, you know, there's this, again, idea that we should be, In other words, one might say, Oh, he's ADD, can't pay attention.

Except that's not what his body in his mind are wanting to pay attention to in this moment. He's having a thought, he's contemplating something that, and so it, it takes him away from like paying attention to what they want to teach him. Right? It's just fascinating when you really think about this idea.

What world gets to be valued, you know? 

Asia: Mm-hmm. , 

Monica: what world are we placing emphasis on and why? 

Asia: Right? Yeah. And you know, I talk in the book about how I was a very daydreamy kid, same. I was sort of constantly going off into my own world and I was really telegraphed this message that that was a bad thing.

That there was only one real world. The, the human world basically of of the society and culture that I was a part of. And I would be remiss if I didn't join it. And yet my inner world was where so much richness happened and it was really an experience. becoming an adult, and I had to return to that world because I really sort of embodied this message and this training, that it was selfish for me to go into my own world, that it was unproductive.

It would mean that I, I wasn't gonna be able to keep up in, you know, the school environment or, you know, the worlds that I, I moved through and. In the book, I talk about realizing how every being in nature is in their own world. , like it wouldn't make any sense for it to be otherwise. You know, like a, a heron is not gonna be in the world of the swamp Cypress like, Ahas.

Aha. So it's like, you know, of course we're all supposed to be in our own worlds. That's how we feed the, this collection of beings that make up an ecosystem. All of us being in our own worlds fully and and completely 

Monica: well, and the earth is such an incredible example of just all of the creations that are populating this planet.

And it's almost like. Recently interviewed a woman, and we ended up talking about the movie, The Never Ending Story, and the Nothing and How the nothing sweeps over the land and all of these species start disappearing, and it's like maybe we've lost our imagination and therefore the species are disappearing.

Maybe all of what exists on this planet had to have first been imagined. I don't know. 

Asia: Yeah, absolutely. I think this is the wider dream of the earth that we are a part of, and we're meant to co-create with that dream. We're meant to be a part of it, and we've forgotten that, but there's always the way back.

That door is always open. 

Monica: Yes. Oh my gosh. That door is always open, and I'll quote you again. There is an old Chinese proverb. The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. And so if you've lost your imagination, it's not too late. The second best time is now. Right? Is now. Is now, is now.

Okay, so I loved this. I loved this whole book, and you talk about grief in this chapter. And I found it so beautiful. People say that the depths of our grief match how profoundly we loved. If this is true, then the overwhelming emotion that we feel when we witness all of the ecological loss in our world today is a measure of how deeply we love this planet and perhaps how profoundly the love the earth loves us in return.

We think we are too fragile for these times. But we are not, as saner cultures begin to sprout in healthier ways of relating, take root. Again, we are learning the one skill we need to survive at all. How to let the earth hold us so that we can remember how to hold ourselves. It's like, wow. 

Asia: Yeah. That chapter was written in the, the aftermath of a loss in my life and. The grief that I was, I was trying to hold and, and move through. And just this realization that, you know, grief is, in some ways it is this portal and it's this, this opening to help us see how much we love and, and how much we are loved. And I think that the ecological grief that we experience, it can feel crippling to look around at the world and just see.

Everything that's going wrong in some ways, you know, all the species loss and the, the habitat destruction and, you know, the, the climate change. And it's a very real experience to feel stymied by that grief. And you know, the other side of that is this invitation to recognize that the grief is just a sign.

How deeply we love, how deeply we are loved, how deeply this relationship matters to us, and that we're, we're here to help this healing happen. And this, we often think that has to look like a really big move or like a, you know, policy change on an international level, which obviously needs to happen. , but, and it begins on an individual level.

It begins on this level of learning how to hold ourselves, how to hold ourselves through our own, you know, inner devastations and, and griefs, because that healing ripples out into the world at large. You know, you look at it really in, in, in truth, the small number of, of people who are causing a great deal of damage on this planet.

You know, people who are in big positions of, of power. And you look at it and you see. , you know, at the center of that is a hurt that that person is just replicating over and over and over again. 

Monica: Mm-hmm. 

Asia: And that hurt really comes down to this space of, of not feeling good, of like, they not feeling that they are good, not seeing their value.

You know, if someone really, truly saw their, their own innate goodness, you know, would they feel the need to strip by? A mountain to remove resources in order to be rich and wealthy and seen in a certain light. You know, maybe then I'll, I'll really have my dad's approval or, you know, whatever it is.

Whatever the story is. And so looking at that, it's like this is, this is at the center of the, the hurt that we're experiencing in this world and the ecological devastation. So you going on this journey of this very personal self healing and self holding is how the world changes. 

Monica: Mm. It's so true. It's how the world changes.

And I also wanna say, you know, you point to this in your book, but it's also like where quantum changes can happen. I think even from that perspective, it's like these, this small percentage of people doing these things in the world, if they just used that same energy for good, you know how much goodness could come like just in a millisecond.

Again, it's the, just the flip side of that power just then flips over into the goodness. And that goodness is always magnified. Always magnified, because I think that there's enough of us out here who get our own goodness that. When we see the goodness, it creates resonance and the resonance just creates these ripples of potential impossibility.

And that's where I think true magic happen, that tipping point, I'll call it, of goodness that begins to just resonate and a and awaken like ripples across the planet. It's just, it's such a beautiful thing to even imagine, because. It's so right there. It's like literally a conversation away. That's sometimes how I have seen more things happen with just brave conversations than anything else.

It's like even you daring to write this book, it's like a conversation that now is in the world, that now gets access through all of these different conversations that you have brought, you know, with your writing and with your ideas. in this book or in that conversation is so much potential and possibility.

It's like, how can it not happen? It's just so pregnant with possibility. 

Asia: Mm. 

Monica: You talk about magic here. Magic begins when we unshackle ourselves from the paradigm of inevitability and the, and open the way for quantum leaps in our imagination. Magic starts when we are able to question our automatic beliefs, the patterns of thinking.

That we often mistake for natural law. Magic takes root when we can approach a dead end and then continue past it. Repeating the mantra of maybe hmm. The magic of maybe, 

Asia: Yeah. I think that we, we see magic as something supernatural, but actually there's nothing more natural in the world, and so much of magic comes down to our percept.

You know, how, how we view things and how we see things and, and I love that word. Maybe because I feel like it opens up so much possibility. And you know, someone asked me recently, what's one word that you feel like has really. Defined your life or informed your life. And I thought about it for a while and I thought, you know, I think that word is possibility for me.

Monica: Mm-hmm.

Asia: You know that so many times where I was handed what looked like a dead end, you know, for example, with this chronic pain condition in my early life, I was told that I would live with it for the rest of my life. That there was no recourse except for to remove nerve endings from this area of my body to literally remove sensation and feeling from this area of my body.

And yet I held onto this word possibility and the magic of that. And you look around you at the living world and you see possibility everywhere. You know, a tree falls in the forest and, you know, a, a raucous collection of flowers grows up. And so, you know, we see that for the earth, like there is no such thing as endings.

There's only possibility. And every death is a, is a rebirth. And it's magical to think in that way and to say, well, maybe to question the beliefs. He us in that take away possibility that drain our hope. And I think that that process of really reclaiming the expansive possibilities of our own perception is a gift that we can bring to this world.

Monica: Yes, it is such a gift and I've had the gift of so many mentors who ha literally. See every challenge as an opportunity. You know what I mean? See every obstacle as a possibility. It's like fascinating to me because there is this seduction and you talk about it to kind of go into this. Cynicism and resignation about the way life is or the way of the world, and it is seductive.

Like there's something about that that like kind of has always wanted to pull me into the depths, but maybe that's, maybe that's so that I can feel more deeply. I don't know. But what I do know is that what you say is so true, which is that. What is, Well, probably I should just read it here. I felt a seductive pull to fall into the sad gravity of it all to build a buffer between me and the moment by retreating into the absorbing blackness, The simplicity of fatalism, part of me wanted to be stopped by a dead end because it felt easier than admitting that there was still a pathway beyond the bend.

Asia: Yeah, it is easier in some ways to just be like, Well, the world's messed up and that's that. Yeah. You know, and, and I, I think that that's, it's sometimes it's a reaction to the bigness that's there, the bigness of what we're being asked to feel and experience. And, you know, I've gone through cycles of this, you know, I remember when I was a younger person and really learning more.

You know, just the, the trauma that has happened in this world, you know, the trauma of colonization and, you know, the trauma of capitalism and just feeling like just completely destroyed by it and. And thinking if I can just, like, if I just like basically write it all off, like, okay, well we we're all basically f and

Like, you can say it if you want. Yeah. You know, and so, you know, what's, what's the point? Right. But it, it almost felt like walking into a void and hanging out there and then being like, Okay, but I'm still in the void. So, What now? And you know, I, I used to guide people in hypnosis and, and meditation and, and the void was a very real place that people often go to first and hang out in and they get really frustrated with it.

Like, there's nothing happening here. And yet I'm like, the void is actually really important and. Healing you go to the void first in order to, to process and to, to shed and feel safe enough to then move into the multicolor experience that's waiting for you on the other side in, in this journey or this hypnotic session.

And I think the same is true about fatalism. It's a void that we sometimes need to enter into. It's a void of sadness and grief and, and loss. And almost like the child in us throwing a little bit of a temper tantrum, being like, I don't want to, like, this is messed up. Like I refuse to do this. And that's okay.

That's a, an important place to be in. And you'll notice that you get this sense, that there's something beyond that, that like you can't actually stay there forever. That something is always nudging you and pushing you and moving you, and, and it, it takes a lot of bravery. And, and energy sometimes to step beyond that into something new and a different way of seeing it's vulnerable.

It's very vulnerable to admit that there's new possibility actually, where before you thought there was none. Yeah. But that's really where the rest of your life begins. 

Monica: Yeah, it's so true. It's so, so true. Oh my goodness, my heart is so full from this conversation. It's just been like an incredible conversation and I'm so, like, I, I, I'm always kind of like time, time when I'm having these conversations, just like, it just flies, Absolutely.

Just flies out the window. I also love how you, just to kind of really summarize, I mean, how do you summarize this book? You just don't, I mean, the, I, I cannot. Say enough to my listeners about this book. You just gotta go grab it. There is so much here, so much depth, so much richness, so much, so many revelations that I've had reading it that just have connected me back over and over and over again to truths I had forgotten.

And you talk about, you know, the, the old world is dying and I love what you say about this bogging, you know, people getting bogged down in self doubt and disconnection and really just starting. To lean in to the earth, starting to really lean into her as medicine and that. There's this connection available to us through the earth that really can hold it all.

That we don't have to, we don't have to keep numbing and disconnecting that actually are access back to ourselves and kind of letting go is. Leaning in, laying on being with the earth and all of the ways that she can listen, support, relate, and help. It's like as you awaken the love and the compassion in you, it is awakened in.

The earth and the part of you that is the earth. I'm not saying it correctly, but I think you know what I'm saying cuz you wrote the book . 

Asia: Yeah, no, that's, that's a, that's a beautiful encapsulation. And, and I have seen this to be true time and time again that your awakening is, is an important part of the awakening of, of the wider world.

And that doorway to come back into relationship with the earth is always open to you. That door will never close. 

Monica: I love that. Well, and so as a last, something to leave our listeners with, I'm just gonna read this last passage before we finish up. So Asia says, So gaze out with kindness. And allow the tenderness of the world to enter you.

Let the earth show you how precious you are. When you are parched. Go to the hillside and kneel down, Drink deep from the benevolence that is there. A new old way is bubbling up from beneath the surface, and you are a carrier of this miracle. When things get hard, remember to search for yourself in the loving mirror of the earth, protect what is within you.

Ready to grow. Let your own inner world nourish the earth. Embrace every knock in your life as part of what makes you so unique. Trust your own timelines. Celebrate the parts of you that are small, tender, fallible. Know that the world sees you and embraces every I iotta of who you are. You are forgiven.

Your heart is big enough to hold it all. Every time you believe in a new possibility for your. And the life of this world, you feed the mysterious healing of the earth. Just so well done. My God. Thank you. Thank you for this book. Thank you for your oh, beautiful heart. Thank you for your work in the world.

Asia: Thank you, Monica. It's just really an honor to be here with you in this incredible audience here who's revolved around your amazing heart offerings in the world. So, Thank you for having me. 

Monica: Yeah, and for our listeners, we'll be sure to put all of Asia's links in the show notes. I'll go get a box of Kleenex. And until next time, more to be revealed.

We hope you enjoyed this episode. For more information, please visit us@jointherevelation.com and be sure to download our free gift, subscribe to our mailing list or leave us a review on iTunes. We thank. Your generous listening and as always, more to be revealed.