[Music]
All right, so episode 100 are we actually owning that number?
It's technically not.
Is it 0100 or is it 100?
It's 100. It is episode 100.
It's 100.
We're doing 100. We're claiming this as the official 100th episode
despite the fact we had an episode with 000 and we had a 97A or something.
It's fine.
I think we also had a like a 52A and a 522 or something like that as well.
The numbers say 100 so I'm taking it as 100.
Numbers don't lie.
Not in my spreadsheets they don't.
This episode is already costing me $15 a week.
So let's get going.
I don't think Jason ever actually believed we would get this far.
No. Was it 10? I think 10. No, that even sounds high.
I think maybe 3 is where I thought would be the sweet spot.
And by sweet spot I mean it would fizzle out and die.
Well talking about fizzling out and dying it is 35 degrees Celsius today
and I can't ventilate or fan this room for fear of ruining the microphone and the recording.
I don't know. What is that in Fahrenheit, Jason? Have you converted that?
35C in F is 95F.
Yeah, so I might fizzle out and die while we're talking.
That's pretty warm.
It is.
Yeah. This is a bamboo shirt. I'm trying a new experiment. Thank you, Natasha.
You might want to turn that iron off that's behind you because that's probably adding to the heat.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's more like a sauna in here, isn't it?
I admire the fact you have been doing your ironing prior to podcasting, but I hope you've turned it off.
I don't think you're supposed to iron bamboo shirts though.
I think that's... No, it had an iron logo on it.
Oh, it did? It said it was okay.
Oh, okay.
Did you do the little thing where you point your phone at it and it tells you what the symbols are?
No, I didn't. I should try that.
Apparently it does that. I've not actually tried it, but that's pretty cool.
Speaking of bamboo, if either of you were to go to canyon.blog/save, you'll find a coupon code there for bamboo underwear.
I encourage you to give it a go.
Are you wearing it? Is this a sponsor kind of read?
Not today. No.
He's checking his underwear.
No, not today.
No underwear?
No, other underwear.
Other underwear.
I wore the bamboos yesterday, so they're in the wash now.
Okay.
And your boys are okay?
They're fine.
Okay, good.
Canyon.blog/save.
I was half expecting you to start trying to promote Bamboo HR, which is like an HR web platform thing.
I was like, "Oh, God, please no."
See, that's the great news about Canyon 100.
We're finally a serious podcast and we have advertising.
And canyon.blog/save is their advertiser.
Wow. Thank you to canyon.blog/save for being today's sponsor on episode 100 of Hemispheric Views.
Now, before we get to the main event, which is in our running sheet for this episode, we have a new OnePrimePlus.com member, and they are Scott W.
Thank you very much, Scott.
Scott W. Welcome to the family?
Yeah, welcome to the family.
Why not?
OnePrimePlus.
I don't think we can use that line.
Oh.
Welcome to the long game.
Yes, that's better because I think the "Welcome to the family" is related to the We Got Family, which is the podcast about the Fast and the Furious, which is a podcast done by Rob with two Bs.
Who does the-
What podcast does he do?
I think that's- Is that the Ruminate one?
There we go.
Yeah, Ruminate.
There we go, Ruminate. Yeah, okay. So we just carried on the streak there.
But that's not to take away from the OnePrimePlus newest member, Scott W.
And how do you expect that Scott W found his way into OnePrimePlus? How could others follow in these illustrious footsteps?
There's a thing called the internet. It helps you get to the web, and I believe that's where OnePrimePlus.com is hosted. I think the .com gives it away.
Oh, okay. So you cruise down the old information superhighway, take an exit at www, and then you end up at OnePrimePlus.com, the best domain on the internet.
Now, keen-eared listeners would know that I had some questions or comments about spelling of names in a recent episode, other OnePrimePlus members.
Can I just check in with you guys? Scott, is he a single T or is he a two T kind of guy?
This is a two T situation.
Okay.
I approve of both.
I only approve of one of those.
So now you're alienating. Even guests have been on the show, am I right?
If they're Scott spelled wrong, they need to have a good hard long look at themselves and have a conversation with their parents.
Look, clearly the only way to spell Scott correctly is with two Ts.
So we have avoided an upset new OnePrimePlus member because I think he's in the good camp.
So thanks, Scott.
I hope no one goes back to previous episodes to fact check that about what you just said, because I'm fairly certain you were the other way with the last one.
No, no, no, no.
No, no, surely not.
Yeah, no, this is, yeah, this would never change.
I am consistent to my core on this one.
The surname Canyon definitely isn't misspelled, that's for sure.
Yeah, he is consistent with two Ts.
Good on, Scott. So thank you.
Welcome, welcome.
Ever change your name to one T?
Get out of here.
Oh, boy.
Well, Scott, if you happen to still be around, be sure to check your email for your welcome email where you can get stickers and get all the past episodes of OnePrimePlus, all of the past newsletters, all of the past everything you get everything.
Once you join, you're in, you get it all.
The treasure chest is in front of you ready to be opened.
And if anyone else feels the need to say for speed, but that's not really, I think that's copyright getting back in that fast and furious.
Sorry, sorry.
If anybody feels the need for OnePrimePlus.com, go to OnePrimePlus.com and sign up today.
You mentioned stickers.
Oh, OK.
We can't let this go by.
Stick.
There is a very impressive big sticker news.
Can tell us big sticker news.
Yeah. Speaking of stickers, since you just were, what if I were to tell you there were a little shop on the Internet where you could get themed hemispheric few stickers for a reasonable amount of money in exchange?
What if I were to tell you that?
How excited would you be?
Scale of one to ten?
It's not.
Can you not blog slash save?
But I'm going to give it a night.
I'm going to go.
OK.
I'm assuming that blog slash save is a ten.
Is that totally bar?
OK.
So eight is pretty good.
Martin, you don't look.
I'm not a huge sticker person.
And if it's other people's stickers, I congratulate them.
It would probably be like a two.
But if it's ours and it's made by someone called Jason Burke, then I'm an 11.
Oh, wow.
It's gone full spinal tap.
OK, I'm like a nine and a half here.
Really?
OK, this is good.
Yeah, so if you go to hemisphericfuse.com/shop, you will end up at a little sticker shop where
you can pick up one of four amazing, wonderful, dare I say perfect stickers.
One, the logo of the show.
Everybody needs that.
You need to stick that on everything in your life.
Two, maybe you've heard of a little thing called Vegemite.
I haven't.
But this other sticker looks pretty much like that.
I wouldn't say it looks exactly like that because that's copyright.
And then the third one, if you have, I don't know how you could not have heard about this.
A little thing we like to call the default episode 097 that has taken the Internet, the world, the universe by storm, I would say.
There's a default sticker in commemoration of that whole thing.
So it's a it is a sticker of a laptop with stickers on it to stick on your laptop.
What else do you need?
It's glorious.
This is my favorite by far.
I love it.
And if you're feeling really frisky, there's also the coveted One Prime Plus shield available for the price of $10,000.
Or go to oneprimeplus.com and get a massive discount and just sign up for a monthly thing as low as $2 per month.
I do love looking at this store right now.
It's literally listed at $10,000.
Not just $10,000, but $10,000 US.
So all the Australians out there, just join One Prime Plus.
Yeah, it's so much easier.
So heavensforfuse.com/shop.
Get yourself some stickers.
It makes our housing prices look like they kind of make sense.
Think about it.
Yeah, if a sticker is 10 grand, like what's a house?
It's a million dollar house.
It makes total sense.
Minimum.
Wow.
Well done, Jason.
No, seriously, when you sent through those designs, I'm like, wow.
Okay, serious creativity.
Yeah, this is like literally that little gift from Futurama, the throw me the money thing.
Yeah, take my money.
They're a premium quality, I will say.
We will not push out crap stickers.
They are of the utmost quality.
So get in there.
Get used to that.
For the main event of this episode, I was thinking as we were approaching this recording, 100 is a big deal, right?
I mean, yeah, it's just like any other number, but traditionally it's a bit of a milestone.
You kind of want to do something.
I thought we don't really want a clip show or something and just racking up old stuff because that's kind of, we don't want like a greatest hits.
We want to do something that's kind of like what we've done before, which maybe listeners will enjoy, but a little bit different.
So given how much people enjoyed the app defaults episode, and that was a competition with some very interesting scoring technique and protocol by Andrew.
But, you know, people liked it.
That's good.
Thank you, Andrew.
Liked it.
Let's do.
Yeah, quote unquote.
Yeah, it was great.
I still have open legal cases surrounding this, by the way.
Well, good luck with that.
I thought we would do a kind of mega app corner with a flavor of history, nostalgia and maybe some shame and embarrassment thrown in there, depending on how this goes.
This isn't so much a competition.
It's a bit of a round robin of three categories as we look into our ancient purchase history of apps.
And that could be the app store, cross platforms for Apple or even things that you've purchased on the web.
So we're going to go through three different categories of earlier apps or things that we've enjoyed.
And I don't know who wants to go first.
You should I just pick or whatever?
Yeah, pick somebody.
Flip flip a three sided coin.
Three sided coin.
There it is.
Imaginary.
Looks like it was there.
And the answer is we're going to go clockwise according to my screen.
And that is Jason first, Andrew and then me.
All right.
So what we're going to do is we're going to drag up some things from our past and maybe discuss maybe throw a heap of shit at each other.
We'll see how we go.
And the first category that I want to know, Jason, starting with you, number one, early iOS app or game.
What is something from the first few years of the app store that is now obsolete or maybe still works but is a bit weird or embarrassing?
What's something that you found early in that purchase history?
And Andrew, you have to be ready next.
Yep.
Got it.
So first of all, this was this was really weird to go to that purchased area scroll for seemingly forever.
It takes a long time.
To finally get all the way to the bottom.
So I have to say I'm a little bit shocked and I guess impressed that all of that crap still is in there.
So that that was the first one.
I actually picked the very first thing that was on my purchase list, not so much because it was embarrassing, but more because I was just like, really of all, you know, the app store became a thing.
And on the very first day at the very first minute, like, that's the thing I picked to download.
Like, I was so excited.
The first ever.
I think we all have to we all have to disclose the first item on our lists as well.
Actually, I think this is an additive thing.
I didn't check that bit.
I better have a look.
I scroll for 45 minutes.
You go, you go.
I can scroll at the same time.
I can multitask.
My first iOS app.
And this is just what's in the list.
So if for some reason the list doesn't include everything.
Well, whatever.
This is just what's in the list.
So the very first one on July 10th, 2008.
iTunes remote.
Look at you.
I was downloading iTunes remote.
Why did I think that was like the hottest thing to get in the app store?
Steve Jobs told you to, Jason.
The brand new app store.
The thing that's going to change the world that I get iTunes remote.
Like, that's the lamest thing ever.
And quick question.
Is it in the not on this iPhone category or is it just the whole lot?
Like, you could actually still use the new remote or have it installed on your phone today?
That I am not sure.
I did as a follow-up, I was going to ask you a similar question of how many of the first 10 things you downloaded are still either available to do the little download or do you actually still have one of those on your device today?
Oh, none of them.
No, none of them.
They're all in the dustbin of history.
I have to look and see if iTunes remote is actually a thing anymore, though.
Hold on.
Let me do the.
I don't know if it's the remote like it works.
I use it all the time, like on the watch for Apple TV.
It still has the little download cloud next to it.
I don't know if that means it will actually work.
I would assume that's what it means, but it's still downloadable, apparently, since 2008.
Do you know what?
Do you know what, Jason Burke?
Sorry, but in on your thing.
I changed remote.
The second bottom item on my list.
This must have been the hot item.
Was that the only app available on day one, maybe or something?
And we were just like, we have to get apps.
October 2008, iTunes remote.
Wow.
Were you both equally enthusiastically using ping and adding your top 10 favorite apps to the top right of the iTunes window?
We must have been.
I don't even actually remember what iTunes remote was.
I assume it was to use my phone to control iTunes on my computer for some reason.
You remember they had that party shuffle kind of thing on iTunes DJ, where if you were actually in, like, according to Steve Jobs' ideal idea of how you would run a party, you could actually shuffle and, like, add songs to a queue and it would be like an administrator.
I think they kind of brought similar functionality back recently.
I just like the idea of Steve Jobs' ideal way to run a party.
Yeah, with an iPod high-five in the corner.
No furniture.
With the Gorillaz album artwork.
And a wooden floor and everybody just sits there eating fruit in silence.
Oh my goodness.
No shoes.
Love it.
No shoes.
So, wait, Martin, I have to know then, do you have iTunes remote as one of your first few downloads?
No, actually.
Oh.
I have used it, but if I type in remote, I've got, like, the remote app on my phone as it currently stands today for, like, Apple TV and stuff.
So, yeah, it's there, but I can't see the other use cases.
I'm telling you, it's the hotness right now.
It's what all the kids are using.
Apparently, yeah.
I'm going to download it and see what happens.
So, Andrew.
Yes.
Your turn.
So, you can still say the one you're going to say, but Jason's thrown in that extra thing of the very first.
So, I suppose that's an extra category.
Okay.
All right.
So, it's a double category this one.
Okay.
So, what I'll do, I'll start with the proper question that you asked, the early iOS app game, something that's obsolete or a little embarrassing.
I am choosing an application called Notetaker HD.
Oh, God.
So on brand right now.
Oh, boy.
HD.
I completely forgot about that whole thing.
So, this is actually an iPad app, right?
Yeah.
So, it's--
Ooh.
Yeah, because I was big on the iPad.
I bought the iPad day one, like, release up at midnight, buying that iPad.
And HD was always-- that was-- if it went from the phone to the iPad, it was the HD version.
HD, yeah, yeah, exactly.
Wow.
It never really made sense.
But this was an app and it was-- this was the era where, remember, the iPad didn't have a pencil.
So, but rather than, you know, if they've got a stylus, you blew it.
There was this sort of weird third party market for--
The Jot.
Styli.
Was it the Jot?
Yeah, I don't think I ever bought the Jot.
I think I lusted after it, but--
That one with the little disc, remember that?
Yeah, yeah, I remember the disc.
But this-- the one I had was more just like a little rubber nubbin.
Was it the Cosmonaut?
Again, Cosmonaut.
I never wanted to spend that kind of money, so I was too much for a tight wad.
So, I bought the cheapy version.
And it had a little clip, so you could clip it in your pocket.
Oh.
You know, classic, classic.
And no leaking in that breast pocket.
No way, no way.
It was ink free.
It was just my little rubber nubbin.
But it-- so, you would use that and--
Taking a note for the title, just my little rubber nubbin.
So, Notetaker HD, it was designed to be that sort of that first era of writing on your iPad to take notes.
And it, you know, did the magnification area, so you could write a bit bigger and it would shrink it down.
And it seemed like it was perfect.
It was like a great concept.
And what really got me motivated to buy it was because it was developed by Dan Bricklin.
Dan Bricklin was the creator of VisiCalc, which was the first spreadsheet application.
So, a guy that makes spreadsheets suddenly is excited to make iPad applications.
I was like, "I'm here for it.
This guy is, you know, symbiotic with me."
It turns out, whether it was the app, which had really, really fuzzy user interface, like, it was kind of--
It was almost like flat design before flat design was a thing.
So, you never knew if you're tapping a button, whether it was active or you just--
And because the iPad was very underpowered, it was slow.
And it just never worked.
And it was just creaky.
And as much as I tried to build it into my workflow, I just had to give up on it.
So, and the icon, oh my gosh, the icon.
We'll make sure it's in show notes.
But this icon is butt ugly.
It's got like this hand holding a pencil.
A hand.
But it's kind of drawn.
It's like pencil art.
I think I've seen the one you're talking about.
Yeah, that should not have been done.
It's really ugly.
So--
Yeah, I think it's ringing bells.
It's pretty embarrassing.
So, that is my embarrassing app.
Also embarrassing is my list.
So, it's interesting.
I brought up my list.
So, my first application on my phone is slightly different to the one that's listed on my Mac for iOS apps.
I guess it's just the way it sorts it in the database.
Both beginning entries are kind of embarrassing for different reasons.
The first list on my phone is Evernote.
Notes Organizer.
From 8th of October 2008.
The first app on my Mac App Store for iOS is Echophon for Twitter.
12th of October 2008.
Oh, I remember that one.
Yeah.
So, neither of those have really stood up to the test of time for different reasons.
But there you go.
I was already-- I was like into social media and notes organization.
In high definition.
The only way to roll.
Followed by full high definition.
Which makes me question how incomplete was high definition.
And then you don't forget XHD and UHD.
Yeah.
Oh, you're breaking my brain, Andrew.
Slow down.
There we go.
I hope that was embarrassing enough, Martin.
I hope it was-- met the spec.
But I'm curious to know.
It was great.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I'm just throwing words out there.
It's up to you to fill it in.
And so, now my turn.
Answering the first part of my question.
Look, this is-- the only way to put it is shameful and questionable.
Oh, I have an idea.
All right.
Here's a guess.
What is it?
No, please.
Please, go ahead.
I don't think you're going to guess this, if I can be honest.
It is the bed intruder soundboard.
The what?
Bed intruder.
So, I scrolled back.
Do you remember in the early days of the iOS or iPhone OS app store, right?
Okay.
There were not only things like the beer tilting games and all those accelerometer gimmicky things,
which were cool at the time, but it was like, okay, we've moved on.
There were also lots of soundboard apps.
Okay.
You know what I mean by soundboard?
Yeah.
So, you take characters or songs or whatever.
Yeah, fart noises.
Do you remember all that sort of stuff?
Yeah.
There was a song, and I looked up just to make sure I got this all right,
by the Gregory Brothers and Antoine and Kelly Dodson,
which was taken from an Alabama news report about this--
There was this guy talking about how there was a bed intruder.
Okay.
You have no idea about the meme I'm talking about.
No, none.
This is going to be the worst show notes ever.
I'm going to have to find all of them.
Is this like sort of the woman with "Ain't got no time for that"?
It's not that one, is it?
Kind of that flavor, but it's like, there is a rapist in Lincoln Park.
Oh, yeah, I know that guy, and he's got the bandana.
Yeah, hard your kids, hard your wife, and hard your husbands,
because they're raping everybody out here.
Yeah, that is amazing.
Okay, I'm with you now.
Yep, yep, I love that guy.
But it was great because they just lent into this ridiculous kind of regional
U.S. news report, and they made an Internet sensation out of it,
cringeworthy by today's standards, but they actually made some success out of this,
I suppose, this interview from this horrible crime,
this attempted crime that was committed, but it became this Internet sensation.
So there you go, earlier Internet remix culture turned into an iOS app
that all of my friends and I at the end of high school thought was a good idea
to download.
Is it still available?
I don't think so, but I don't think I'd be downloading it again anyway.
I would.
I would enjoy that.
Hard your kids, I remember.
Yes, yes.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, hard your kids, hard your wife.
It's just ridiculous.
It's no iTunes remote, I can tell you that.
I'm pretty sure you could buy the song on iTunes at the time, too.
Oh, God, praise it.
It was an actual release.
And then you could get it again as a ringtone for another 99 cents.
Absolutely.
But to answer your question about what now that we've got that probably
inappropriate section out of the way, thank you, listeners.
I don't know how we bleep that.
That'll be up to me to determine what I'm editing this.
The first app that's listed in my iPhone's app store history is frankly
not surprising now that I look at it.
It is the Advanced English Dictionary.
Wow.
Is that the most Martin on brand?
Can we just stop recording now?
Or like is there any point to go on past this?
Gosh.
And straight after that is the Thesaurus.
Wow.
Well, actually, no, it was like Apple news-related apps, to be honest,
and then stuff to do with Volkswagen and BMW,
which is just definitely my interests at the time.
Twitterific's in there.
Wow.
Wow, dictionary.
I love that.
What a different era.
Wow.
That's incredible.
Thank you.
I don't know what else there is to say about that.
So, wait, I had the follow-up question.
If you look at like the first 10 that you downloaded,
how many of them still are downloadable?
Like do they have the little cloud next to them or do they just say like --
Four of them.
Oh, four of 10.
Okay.
Andrew, what do you got?
Of the first 10, one, two --
Yeah, you got a big phone now.
It should be able to fit 10 on the screen.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
That's still downloadable?
Eight out of 10 are still available.
Okay, same for me.
Eight out of 10.
I was really surprised.
Yeah.
I don't know if they --
I assume if there's the little cloud, that means they'll run in some capacity.
Well, yeah.
I don't know what that really means.
I'm disappointed Aqua Forest is no longer available.
That looks interesting.
Oh, I love that one.
Is that the -- that's the green one with the little drop on it?
Do you have it too?
What is it?
Oh, yeah.
That thing was great.
I can't remember what it is, but it looks lovely.
The icon looks beautiful.
What was it?
It was a game.
I believe it was a game if I remember right.
How do we all have the -- I guess there weren't that many to choose from.
There was like eight applications in the beginning.
So if you spend --
Oh, flight controls there.
Look at that.
Oh, flight control.
That was going to come up later in the show from me.
Oh, okay.
Sorry.
We didn't have to say that.
Let's move on then before we get too sucked into the annals of history.
Oh, wait.
Wait.
I do have one more embarrassing one.
Oh, okay.
Oh, if you want.
Yeah.
I have a little app in my library that is called cat piano junior for iPad.
[Laughter]
Not HD.
Is that for cats or for humans?
I don't know what that is.
All I can imagine is it's probably a piano that you were meant to put on the screen
and then the cat would like touch the screen.
I think I might have -- did that have fish that would fly across it and stuff like that
and they'd try and --
I have no idea.
You would be all over that, Jason, I can imagine.
Cat piano junior for iPad.
You didn't want to --
HD.
So basically you're a tired ass.
You didn't buy the proper version.
I think I didn't get the pro version.
I just got the junior.
All right.
Well, that's the first category.
Or now two, technically.
We can solve that in the show notes.
So second category is unused mistake.
Something that you have bought on any platform, could be in the past, even recently or now,
with great excitement or intention but have never really used.
Jason.
Yeah, this was tough, especially because it doesn't show you the price of anything.
So that's sort of annoying.
I wish you could see what you had paid for everything throughout the past.
I also wish it would just say, over the course of your account,
you spent $42 billion on stupid applications.
I don't want to think about that.
Andrew has got a spreadsheet for it.
He does.
Even I block out on that one.
This app store is costing me so much per week still.
That iTunes remote, I'm telling you, it's still $0.03 a week.
As far as unused or things that I had aspirations for, back when -- oh, I just went blank on it.
Apple's pro apps for -- oh, so like Logic.
Those are like audio pro apps.
I had bought them all with this great aspiration that I was going to do all this musical stuff.
Never did any of it.
So I spent an absolute fortune back then on the Apple pro apps, which were like really expensive back then.
I will say all credit given that that purchase from way the hell long time ago,
I still have them all and they all still work.
So as far as how much they cost per week, I don't know.
Figure it out.
But, yeah, having all of those in my library, cool, but really not that useful.
And, of course, you love editing this podcast, so doubly useful.
Yeah, well, now that my life revolves around editing podcasts, which is my number one favorite thing to do,
now it's beginning to pay off.
We should get Jason to edit one more show.
Just see if anybody notices.
It would be good.
He just doesn't like it.
It would be.
I don't think that would be a good idea.
It's not that hard.
No, it's just -- well, it is, actually.
It's very difficult.
It's laborious.
It's really, really hard.
And the fact that both of you do it every week is -- I'm forever grateful.
Well, thank you.
Save that for our performance review.
Now this category, Andrew.
Yeah, sorry.
Andrew, this category I really thought of you when I came up with it,
because I thought there would be some sort of trauma or ongoing pain about the fact that you might have spent something
and you weren't using it.
So I'm not trying to target you here, but I thought it might be funny.
It's a fair point.
Like Jason said, it was tough going through this one.
An unused mistake, something he bought with great excitement.
Yes, there are a number of those, probably a million different note-taking apps, to be perfectly honest.
But the one that came to mind -- Note-taking 4K.
HD.
The one that came to mind as most saddening, I think it was quite expensive.
Like Jason said, I don't know what it was because the price is gone.
But I think I really thought about it before buying it, and then went, "No, I'm going to do this,"
and then subsequently did very little with it and felt sad, was Status Board by Panic.
Oh, yes, that was --
Another iPad, because I was big into the iPad.
I always preferred iPad over iPhone for whatever reason.
I think I felt more businessy.
But, yes, Panic -- Status Board was this thing, and you would provide it with a data source,
and it would create different charts and tables and graphic appearances of the data on your iPad screen.
Status Board.
I love the idea of a Status Board.
I think it's fantastic.
But do you think I could ever get any data in a format that would work with Status Board?
No.
I'm not a programmer, so I think it eventually got to, like,
"Oh, you need to have well-formed JSON files to allow it to do its data."
And the closest I ever got was some kind of CSV file or something like that.
How would you keep that data updated, and how would Status Board suck in the latest stuff?
And then suddenly it was like, "Oh, we run a web server," or something like that.
And it was just all ridiculous.
And so as much as I loved the idea, I realized it was just above my pay grade,
and I never got good use out of it.
But what a -- So it was really sad, because I wanted to love it.
Yes, I would plus one the Status Board thing.
I love Status Boards, but it's always a step too far.
It's an API call, but it's like a really weird thing you have no idea how to do.
Or there's always just this extra bit where you're like, "Yeah, it can pull in --"
Well, back then it would be like, "Oh, it can pull in tweets."
And it's like, "Well, yeah, but so can every other client."
So it's not really that useful to me.
But I'll definitely plus one the Status Board thing.
Super cool.
It looked great, especially if you did the little dongle to a TV and had it on a big screen.
And they did a great sales pitch on it.
That's what got me.
I'd look at the hero shots and screenshots that they had of it, and I'd be like, "Yes, I can have that too."
And you know the one in their office was probably like the most coolest data-rich thing ever.
Yep.
And there was no way us mere mortals were ever going to get there.
Yeah.
So, alas.
I'm glad you two could connect over the Status Board.
It's good.
No, I made it.
Yeah, it's nice.
For me, it's something that continues to be kind of in my life, and I feel nostalgic about, but I also kind of really dislike now.
And that is Duolingo.
Hmm.
Yeah, Duolingo I've been using or had installed on at least one device pretty much since it came out on the App Store.
And early on, with much more basic kind of interface, not quite as heavy courses and all the gamification, I thought it was fantastic.
I tried stuff like Spanish because that's what Natasha did at uni, and I thought, "Oh, that might be interesting to learn and share with her."
I even dipped my toe into Esperanto.
It was a bit of a geeky joke, and I actually found it really easy and learned quite a lot, all of which I've since forgotten.
But the main point was to kind of try to find a really easy, everyday, habitual way of maintaining my German skills because I don't work around or spend a lot of time with Germans like I used to.
It's just, you know, job change moved on, that sort of thing.
And I think even though it's a clever service in what it aims to do, and I don't doubt that a lot of people continue to get a lot of value and education from it,
I feel like it's become progressively worse since they launched it to the point that even though I paid ages ago, and I think it's going to fizzle out or expire soon,
I don't even use it anymore because all the ads that you used to pay to get rid of, right, they've now put every single level you finish is like, "Have you tried this? Do you want to think of that? How about this thing?
Did you know you're in the Amethyst League now? Here's 20,000 gems."
And it's just this ridiculous kind of, "I paid to have something simplified and get rid of all this, and now it's part of this."
It's like the worst of social media and the web, like gamification, social media aspects.
It's like, "Can I just not pay for a clever, kind of simple language course where I just do the levels and move on?
Why do I have to build 10,000 friendships revolving around my learning of a particular type of modifier or conjugation? I don't get it."
So, yeah, it's like the mistake that I kept paying for and is now unused because they've made it almost unusable.
Do you know what you've just described?
What?
Is a business internet trend that you can follow on as a hashtag on Mastodon.
I know this because I do.
Yeah?
It is n-shitification.
Oh, well.
It's where a service starts off really good, they continue to add features to it, their focus changes from creating a good product to boosting the valuation of the business, and ultimately they destroy it.
N-shitification.
I think it's pronounced "engagement."
Engagement.
Well, whatever way you spin it, that's exactly right.
And I feel bad for saying it this way because I think there's a great intention with the app.
I think they do a great job, particularly if they're being honest about how they've helped to revive languages like Gaelic, it's nothing but a good thing.
But the way that you're forced to adopt this engaging slash n-shitified product when it's just like, "I just want to practice some words."
Yeah.
So that's become my unused mistake over time.
Fun fact, tangent, my first downloaded Flashlight app was in 2011.
Was it Flashlight Lite?
No, it's Flashlight with some weird Unicode character after it.
I'm not sure.
So it wasn't L-I-G-H-T-L-I-T-E.
No, and it wasn't Flashlight HD either, unfortunately.
I think you got a bad one.
I think I did, yeah.
Because I got Flashlight full stop.
On the 13th of October, 2008.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, I didn't download a Flashlight app until 2011.
Apparently, I was just not living in the dark.
I don't know.
I only went out in the daytime.
Using light switches, apparently.
I guess so, yeah.
It was last updated two years ago.
I wonder if it still works.
All right.
That brings us to category three.
This is our final official category on the show.
Favorite icon from yesteryear or the past in general.
So what is your favorite earlier icon or kind of older icon design from any app that you've ever owned?
Doesn't matter what platform, before the kind of great iOS 7 flattening or "big-serification" of the Mac.
Where everything went into kind of like round records or squircles.
Okay.
So, Jason, kick us off.
You asked for one.
So obviously, I'm going to do more than that.
Great.
As I was going through my list, I was picking some stuff out here.
So one, I came across 1Password, the first version.
And I forgot how incredibly huge the key was on the 1Password icon.
It was like a giant car key.
It was really big.
And I was just like, "Wow, that's -- okay, cool."
The second one was I noticed a -- I don't think you could call it a trend, but just a thing that was maybe lazy.
Where people would just use just straight up a photo as the icon.
So it would be like a photo of a cat.
And it's like that has nothing to do with anything.
You just drop something in there to get this thing pushed out.
Okay, cool.
The worst icon I found was from an app called EasyPasta.
I don't even know why I downloaded that.
But it was -- not even borderline.
It was offensive, frankly, in the way that this icon was put together.
Okay, now we move into icons that I thought were actually good.
Cha-ching, which was like a money app for like -- you know, Andrew's into this stuff, right?
Yeah, I was just looking at cha-ching.
22nd of March, 2009.
The little pig?
Yeah.
With the little droopy --
With the money coming out of the side.
Yeah, it's like a piggy bank with like a little drawer coming out of the side.
It's kind of weird if you think about it too much.
But I thought it was a really cute, nice icon.
So that was that one.
And then for the number one best icon that I still love and have stolen to use in other places to this day on other things on my computer, the Apple Aperture icon.
Oh, yes.
That's a great one.
Absolutely top tier, just gorgeous, wonderful icon.
That's a good pick.
I think you're just opening up a kind of well of pain for a lot of people about that app in general.
So let's be careful here.
It's fine.
If you went back and used Aperture today, you'd be like, "This is garbage compared to the tools we have today."
But back then --
Yeah, but the sadness that it didn't continue in some way.
Yeah, I suppose.
But different time, different time.
But that icon is --
Beautiful icon.
That purplish kind of on the camera lens, you know, the --
I can only imagine just the hours and just -- I don't even -- it was either somebody just was really good and did it very quickly and was like, "This is perfection," or they just painstakingly put pixel for pixel because it was just perfect in every way.
Yeah, and it's like when -- I don't know if you remember when iOS 7 became a thing.
There were all these people online going, "Look, compared to what they used to be, you could go into Microsoft Word and easily replicate any of these icons.
This shows that the design is just not there.
What's going on?"
So, yeah, big contrast.
Welcome to the internet.
Love them.
Everybody's so happy on the internet.
Yeah, all the time.
Andrew, another happy person on this show.
So it probably will come as a surprise to both of you and many of our listeners that I'm not the most graphical of people.
I tend to prefer, you know, numbers and words ahead of graphics.
And I kind of -- I don't have a great memory for them, so it kind of just washes me past.
I don't usually pay a lot of attention to the icon.
So this was the most challenging question for me because I think back, I'm like, "What were some icons that I used to like?"
And I just don't remember them.
It just doesn't stick in my brain.
So the only one that I could think of was going back to the app that I use most, the one that has been with me forever, my beloved, and that would be OmniFocus.
And OmniFocus used to have this little like -- it's like a little bulldog clip.
And it would get sort of clipped on.
Oh, you'd love that.
Any kind of office station.
Yeah, and it was clipping on to sort of like index cards.
And it looked beautiful.
I don't remember that one.
Well, Jason, I've got some good news for you.
Because if you go ahead and pick up OmniFocus 4.
Okay.
It now has alternative icons.
Oh, boy.
And you can get that glorious little guy back.
Oh, that's nice.
I like when people do that.
Which I have done.
And it's so much better.
Sort of the standard OmniFocus icon is just kind of like the squircle with a checkmark in it.
It's like, "Wow."
Yeah, show me all the apps, all the to-do apps that have a little checkmark.
And when you -- just to double check, when you change that icon on the iOS version, do you need to restart your iPhone approximately 40,000 times for that icon to actually change?
Yeah, of course.
Yeah, that's standard.
And do you want the widget?
Because you'll probably have to reboot your phone if you want a widget as well.
Yeah, I think you just get a new phone and then the widget starts working.
Yeah.
I actually like this most on macOS, this icon.
I have it right now.
I'm looking at it and I'm just going to embigify my dock.
Embigify.
And that is just a beautiful icon.
We can't see a thing, so we think it's also equally beautiful.
So thank you to the Omni group.
Side question, Andrew.
If you could change the Siri animation that pops up in the top right of your screen to Clippy, would you do that?
I would, just for at least a day.
I would.
Yes, I hate Clippy so much.
But yes, or that little Merlin magician guy who's underrated.
Do you remember him?
Did he have a name?
Wasn't it Merlin?
Oh, I don't know.
Maybe.
Or Merlin the wizard guy.
I feel like that would have been like copyright or something.
Clippy stole all the thunder, but there were some underrated characters, alternative characters you could choose.
Like Briefcase.
Nobody's talking about Briefcase anymore.
So, yeah, that takes it to you, Martin.
I kind of chose two app icons here.
One is one that isn't really used anymore, and one is an icon that persists, quite funnily enough.
The first one that I really miss, even though I now use Final Cut Pro, is iMovie HD.
That blue icon, like the slate, the --
Oh, the clapperboard.
Do you know what I mean?
They call it the clapperboard.
Yeah, that's it, the clapperboard.
And it had this beautiful blue kind of gradient in it with two people, like, running, holding hands.
It was just absolutely kind of gorgeous, simple, but three-dimensional design.
And it fit that whole kind of aqua interface of earlier Mac OS X beautifully.
And I miss that look.
You know, maybe just look it up online occasionally just to weep gently and then move on.
But the app icon that persists to this day, and I use all the time, and I love, whether it's out of sheer laziness,
or maybe they've actually updated the app separately and I haven't done it properly,
or they're sticking a big middle finger up, is Handbrake.
I love the Handbrake icon.
And for anyone who doesn't know what Handbrake is, this is a video conversion tool.
So maybe you've got a really big video, you want to compress it a bit but retain some quality.
Maybe you're running a really old iPod and you want to change something about the codecs or the dimensions to make it work.
It's just a really handy app to have, no matter how simply or complicated you want to use it.
And the icon is, no, not a Handbrake, nothing like Transmission.
Remember that app for like torrenting or whatever?
Oh, yeah, that was great. That was a good icon, actually, Martin.
Can I pick that one?
By all means, you can have that one.
Handbrake is not a Handbrake.
It is a picture of a cocktail and a pineapple.
And what I love is that even today, like, well, even back then, it was like a cartoon.
It didn't even fit Steve Jobs' perfect kind of skeuomorphic 3D land.
It was just this flat thing.
It's still there.
And when your video conversion process or queue finishes, it still pops up in the corner saying, "Put down that cocktail.
Your task is ready."
And I love it.
I love that they have not changed it.
And it brings a little bit of joy to my heart every single time that I use it.
And it pops in the dock as just this Tropicana middle finger to the preferred style.
It's like something with video apps because VLC is the same thing.
It's been a cone for a hundred years.
It's like it's updated, so it's not like 32 by 32 pixels, but same thing.
It's like it's just the same icon.
It's great.
Can I just -- I need to look back.
That conversation sparked my thinking.
And I think we have talked about this icon on the show before.
Refer to show notes.
Just a special mention to the icon for SpamSiv.
Especially the photorealistic one that it had for so long.
The mushroom colander?
That was the most god awful.
The cartoon colander was kind of bad.
But if you turn that thing to photorealistic, oh, my God, it was ugly.
So just a shout out to SpamSiv for having -- and persisting.
I think it's changed now.
But up until very recently, it was persisting with the ugliest icon ever.
Martin, you said you like the iMovie clapper.
What about the Final Cut Pro one now?
I find that one to be quite nice also.
Yeah, it's kind of a continuing ode to that, although it's not on that slant.
I really liked that earlier Mac OS X thing.
Even though it was inconsistent with Apple apps and third-party apps, I loved that lean,
that diagonal kind of orientation they would have things.
It gave it a bit of life in the dock.
And I'm not talking just about like when Leopard and Snow Leopard came in and they made, like, the 3D glass.
I just mean the icons were on a slant.
So I've gotten used to the new version with all the squircles/round recs, whatever you're supposed to call them.
I think enough icon kind of makers and app developers have made interesting things,
like special shout out to people like, you know, Daniel Jalkut who does Mars Edit with that rocket kind of leaning out.
The Net News Wire one looks nice.
Pixelmator is great.
I love those little 3D elements they put in.
So I've gotten used to that.
I think there's enough variety.
But yeah, it was just a bit more fun in the earlier years when you just kind of had this hodgepodge of different leaning shapes in your Mac dock.
I like the squircle when there's just some little piece that peeks out from the outside, just a little bit.
Like just totally enhances it.
Just breaking the rules a little bit.
Second tangent of app quest.
My first podcast app was apparently Pocket Casts.
Oh.
So there you go.
There you go.
Still is.
That meant to be somehow.
No, you're an Apple Podcast guy now, aren't you?
Yes, that's correct.
Which I am trying once again for some unknown reason.
Use what works for you.
You like having your notes stopped short.
That's it.
If Apple Podcasts could just have a per podcast playback speed setting, that would be perfect.
I know Jason, you're like 1X.
They do.
It's literally built in.
It's called everything plays at 1X as the heavens intended.
Yeah, but I think I've said this before.
No, no.
There's no but.
No, it's 1X.
Some of you Americans.
If it's too slow for you, stop listening to it.
Yeah, you Americans, could you speed it up a little bit?
Jeez, you talk slow.
Why don't you slow down?
Enjoy the moment.
Take it in.
This is art.
This is art that's being created.
Martin is going to spend countless hours perfectly slicing and dicing to make it the perfect audio experience.
And then you're going to come in and just shit all over it with 3X playback?
I don't think so.
I have to say, Jason, the way, look, listeners can't see this, but the way that you were slowly hunching over into some like Gollum figure as you were imitating, that is actually, if people need to see me editing, like slowly sinking into a chair, doing surgically precise like scalpel slices where I go, you know what, that was like a microsecond off the exact gap to get the reaction link to the joke that Andrew just said based on what Jason said after Martin breathed this way.
That is what you are getting with every episode.
Andrew does a great job, too.
I have no doubt that your technique is different, but I'm like a bit of a heap of like meat bag flesh on the lounge by the end of it.
Do you watch movies at 2X?
No, you don't, because you want to enjoy the experience.
If they're crap and you want to get to the end and you don't care.
Actually, no, I've never done that.
Then you just skip it.
You just skip it.
Last but not least, I have to bring back, you mentioned it earlier, a couple of games, flight control.
When I passed by that one, oh, so much fun that game was.
It was so great.
And then Doodle Jump was another one that was just hours of.
My sister was obsessed with that game.
She was the Doodle Jumper of the planet.
Did you guys ever play, hold on, I've got to ask you a question.
Just give me one sec.
Chromag Rally Nanosaur and Bumpton?
Yes.
Only in HD.
The two greatest games on iOS ever were the original Forensic and Stratagery.
I don't know that one.
It was almost like a little mini game at risk.
And you had little colored dots.
The other trend I noticed is that if there was a solitaire game, a golf game, or anything camera related, I downloaded it.
Every camera app ever made, I'm pretty sure I have downloaded at some point because, wow, there was a lot in that list.
Until you had to train really hard for our default episode.
Delete everything.
Delete them all.
That's gone.
I have a lot of business productivity apps.
Surprise.
And they no doubt raised your, you know, lifted your productivity to unseen levels.
Briefcase icons, shirt pockets with pens in it, pocket protectors, ties.
Yeah.
When Calendar went to like leather stitching with that torn bit of paper, it was like, it's like a real.
I know I didn't like that.
No, that drove me bonkers.
That's when I went into third party Calendar app world, which is another whole rabbit hole.
It was kind of fun.
Well, look, what I wanted to say, because no doubt we've pissed people off.
We've hopefully amused them.
Listeners, if you have an early iOS, Apple game, an unused mistake, an icon from yesteryear, let us know in the Discord.
Tell us on Mastodon, micro.blog, email, write a post about it, whatever.
Let us know, because I have no doubt that there'll be something that we've missed or that someone wants to.
Actually, I think what we're going to do is we're going to get Rob to build a website.
To track all that.
No.
That would be easy.
No, don't do it.
Please don't do it.
No.
Rob was busy enough.
Poor guy.
He just went into fatal position.
Not again.
No, but it's the point.
It's just such a long list scrolling.
You just know there's stuff that we missed.
I don't know what people have to say.
I'm also just now realizing and shocked that not a single app or thing we mentioned was an "I" something.
Because everything was "I" something back then to a fault.
And none of them were that.
So, congratulations.
And credit to everybody.
No Facebook.
No.
So, well done to us all.
Fantastic.
Yeah, but if anybody did download that iBeer app or the I Am Rich app, let us know.
Do you remember?
We're talking top.
Do you remember the I Am Rich app?
I do.
It was like a red square or something.
And it cost, I think the most you could make an app was like $999 or something.
That was the whole thing for a while.
Genius.
Why do we never think of these things?
All we do is we make stickers.
We did.
There was a sticker for $10,000.
Good point.
So, there you go.
Everybody go buy one of those.
Yeah, go buy one of those.
Or six.
Whatever you feel like.
And when you're finished, let us know your ancient purchase history.
I want to know.
Well, everybody, that has been Hemispheric Fuse, episode 100.
We thank you for listening today and every fortnight as we explore the world of adjacent
technology, social exercises, and culture.
We really appreciate your time, your commitment to our Type 45.
We love you all, and we'll talk to you next time.
Good night.
See ya.
[Music]
Three, two, one.
Hang on, I have a little thing.
Oh, boy.
No, no, no, no, no.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Settle down there.
It's like we haven't been doing this for 100 times already.
Okay, I got it.
I'm ready now.
All right, all right, all right.
Here we go.
Three, two, one.
Stop.
How was I supposed to stop?