Welcome to the Money Mindset Podcast. Well, you'll find a judgment free zone to help you free yourself from overthinking and the fear of doing things the wrong way. It's time to shed yourself with the mom, guilt, procrastination, and perfectionism so you can start doing the things that you really want to do with your money instead of just working to pay bills.

I'm Ashley Patrick, ex detective Turn debt free CEO of my very own business and stay-at-home mom of three. Not too long ago, my dreams of staying at home with my kids seemed impossible. I thought I'd have to stay miserable in a high stress and demanding job just so I could retire someday. After gaining the confidence in my own ability to manage my family's finances and a simple step-by-step plan to make it happen,

I was able to pay off $45,000 in just 17 months, which then allowed me to finally quit my job, stay at home with my kids and build a debt-free business. Now my mission is to help moms like you conquer debt and free themselves from the mental load of handling their family's finances. If you're ready to shed the guilt and shame surrounding your past money mistakes and tackle your debt,

this is the place for you. Let's get started. In today's episode, we are doing a budget strategy session with SI Laws. Now we talk about some ways for her to manage her spending as well as tracking her expenses so that she can reach her bigger financial goals after losing her mom and having to quit her job to take care of her mom and her son.

And now she's ready to get back on track with life and her finances and start going again. And you know, these sessions are just so incredibly helpful for those of you listening, but also the people that show up for these sessions, they don't cost a thing. And even after SI's session, which we recorded a couple weeks ago, she posted in the free Facebook group.

Wow, thank you so much. I had an online budget review session with Ashley Patrick. I've gone from being overwhelmed and burning my head to knowing how to do this. I started listening to the podcast this week and it's inspirational now. If you want to be able to get back on track with your finances and feel in control again, come join us for the Money Plan Bootcamp.

We start in less than two weeks, about a week and a half now, and I will be going through as a group step-by-step training to create a realistic plan for 2023 so that you can get past the overwhelm and feeling stuck with your finances and create a realistic plan so you can get started and make this the year that you actually do the thing instead of putting it off and putting it off.

And then next year you do your taxes and you're like, what the heck? Where did all my money go? Why didn't I make any progress? Now is your opportunity to really hit the ground running the beginning of the year. Let's set you up for success. Now you can save your seat by going to budgets made easy.com/bootcamp. Now let's get going on size episode.

Enjoy. Thank you size so much for being here for another budget strategy session. How are you doing today? Good, thank you. Good. Now we've had some technical difficulties, but I think we are ready to go. So if you notice the sound as you're listening sounds a, you know, we can still have the conversation. So I think it's important to still have the conversation even though technology is not,

is like never my friend, if you've been with me for a while, you know that technology just hates me. But we're gonna dive in anyway and we are going to tackle her biggest struggle and some quick action steps that she can take to get through that and kind of start making progress. So that's what we do here in the budget strategy session. So before we kind of dive into your biggest struggle,

of course share just what you're comfortable sharing, but can you give us a little bit of background about you or your family, kind of like the overall, you know, high level view of what's, what you've got going on right now? Okay, so, and this is a contributing factor. So there is me and my son who's five years old.

I I was, there's always, so when I was pregnant I moved my mum in. So there was me, my son and my mum. We, I was working at the time and my mum was, was poorly. That's why I moved her in. I lost my mum last year and I stopped work to look after her and at that point we were kind of pulling our money together.

I was in a good position financially, had my son and was stopped work to look after her. Mum passed away and I'm in the UK so because I was looking after her, I was getting like 60 pounds a week to look after her. So, but when I, when my mom passed away, that income stopped. I didn't feel ready to go back to work because of that.

But obviously I've still got my son. I also needed an operation so wasn't able to go back to work. So I'm in a situation now where I've literally all my savings and I'm kind of living very, what is it, paycheck to paycheck is, is what you guys say? Yeah, Yeah. So in in in the UK we have a different expression.

Expression. I'm broke. Yeah. So, so yeah. But what I actually realized and by watching you is I actually seem to have a little bit more income than I thought I did. I would've said my income was about just over a thousand pounds, but it's not, it's actually 1,600 pounds, which is quite a big difference. So where is it going and what am I doing?

And yeah, I just have no idea where to start. Gotcha. Well I'm sorry to hear about your mom. It, I mean I know that was a big deal for you and I'm glad that you are now kind of getting back on track and kind of, you know, getting things back going. So is, okay, so I have a couple questions before we get started.

Do, will you keep getting the 1600 if you go back to work or is there like a, a deadline on that where it's doesn't come in anymore or will you have that coming in for a long time? So the 1600, so a thousand pounds worth of that is from a like mum's property. Okay. Awesome. Okay. That's an income there.

And then the 600 pounds is from a, a mixture of, over here we have 80 pounds a month of child benefit. So if you've got a child the gov and you earn under a certain amount, the government gives you 60, 80 pounds. It's like 82 pounds something. Then there is 300 pounds that is from another source that will finish in this this year.

So the 80 pounds will continue. The thousand pounds should continue, the 300 pounds will not continue past August. Okay. And then there's like a 147 pounds that, no, it's 180 pounds actually that's child maintenance from his dad. Gotcha. And that, that potentially could go up or down every August. Gotcha. Okay. So is your plan or desire to go back to work or do you wanna kind of focus on what you have coming in now?

So yes, I need to go back to work. I've taken time to make sure that my son's okay, that was really important and my health is back on track so I am ready to go back to work. So, and and what I, what I do hopefully can go back and and earn really like good money. However, you know, that could be a,

a process. It could be at least a month. So, and I don't wanna go back to work and earn 50,000 pounds a year and dunno where it goes. I feel like I wanna be in a good position budget wise to be able to manage that. Okay, gotcha. Okay. So are you able to maintain all your bills with the money that you have coming in now or are you getting like behind each month and you don't have to go into like the numbers,

but does the money that you have coming in cover all your expenses? It should do, but there was a couple of months where I, I literally had about 800 pounds I think or or between five and and 800 pounds and I really fell behind. So it's like a catch it. Yeah. And when you don't have that much money coming in, it is harder to get caught back up because you're just kind of maintaining with that amount of money I'm sure.

Or you know, you might have a little leftover but it's harder to get, you know, $800 kind of caught back up when you don't have as much coming in. So that's definitely something that once you go back to work and have some extra income, it'll be real easy for you to get caught up and really like make a lot of progress on your financial goals and long-term goals.

So that's awesome that you're able to do that and kind of maintain so then that money will kind of be extra. So do you feel like your struggle based on a comment, you said earlier that I forgot now what it was, but it made me think that you're not a hundred percent sure where the money is going that you are spending each month. Is that correct?

Yeah. Okay. And I'll say that that's probably been a theme probably since I started work. Okay, gotcha. Yeah, that's very common. Very, very normal. Like that's pretty much anybody that is just not, you know, really thinking about what you know, their day-to-day spending. Like hardly anybody does that unless you're like being intentional about it.

So that's very normal. So don't feel bad that that it's that way cuz that's totally normal. So what I would suggest for you is to, there's a couple things you can do to kinda be intentional with where your money is going and being able to know where it went instead of having that feeling of where did it go? I don't know. So,

and the biggest thing to do for that is tracking your spending, which is the thing that nobody wants to do and there's a couple ways that you can do it is, you know, if you like pen and paper like I do, I just carry a small notebook, it doesn't have to be like a big planner or anything like that. I carry just a,

a smaller sized notebook with me like in my purse or if I'm at home I'll bring it inside when I need to like catch up my tracking and stuff. But I literally write down every transaction and that's the biggest impact on your mindset and when, when you start actually looking at the numbers of where your money has been going, it's like oh my gosh,

I can't believe I spent that much money eating out or on groceries or just Amazon or you know what I mean? So it's like once you realize what the number is, usually something will click and you can start to change that behavior because it's like, oh my gosh, I can't believe I spent that much because it's a little here, it's a little there and it just adds up and we don't realize it.

So the same thing happens to me when I'm not writing things down. So that's the biggest way to kind of get a handle on that. And if you don't like pen and paper, of course you could use the simple spreadsheet, a Google sheet, it's free and you can just put in like the date, the transaction, the category. And one thing I like to do that helps me kind of keep track of the numbers.

So I have, you know, when we used to write checks, I don't know if you're old enough if you to write checks, nobody writes checks anymore. But you know, we used to have these checkbook registers and we would write down the day the check number, the where we wrote the check to the amount if it posted yet in your bank balance.

So what I do is the same concept, but I have a column for the category. So like let's say it's food. So I'll have a column, I'll have the main column that says category, so it'll be food. Then I have another column next to that that says food balance. So how much is left in my food category and then I will have food spent and how much I've spent in the category.

I just like to see those two numbers. If you're not, if you're doing everything digital so that you can see okay, I've spent this much on food and this is how much I have left for food until the new month starts or new paycheck, however you wanna divide it up. So that has been very helpful for me. And then the other thing that you could do,

I don't know if you use much cash or I know some countries like hardly anybody uses cash, but I do encourage if you're comfortable with it, if it's something that you can do pretty easily is to use cash envelopes. But if you don't, you there are digital ways to use envelopes and basically the overall ideas once you like get money that comes in because since you have several different sources,

I'm gonna assume that it probably, it may come in at different times so you're not getting just one paycheck. So it makes it a little bit, it's a, it's some extra steps to kind of create the plan itself versus like a paycheck budget where when you get paid, this is what you do. So same concept but you'll need to tweak it a little bit for your situation.

But basically what you would do is when the money comes in you have a plan for it. And so when you get, let's say the thousand dollars, you're gonna pay this bill, this bill, this bill have this much money for food, this much money for entertainment or transportation or whatever the other things that you need to pay for. And some of those categories,

let's say eating out cuz that's a big one for a lot of us, at least here in the US we eat out a lot and that's one that you could do with cash. So let's say your budget is $50 and as an example, you take out $50 in cash and you just have it there in an envelope. So like you literally have to hand over the money and when you spend and it's gone,

then you, you're supposed to stop spending. That's the idea. You see it and you see you're out of money for that category and you stop spending. So it's kind of an extra mental step as well cuz it feels very different to hand over the cash versus swiping a card. It just does. So I encourage that for categories that you are regularly overspending on and usually it's food,

either groceries or fast food or you know, eating out. So that's typically the biggest, you don't have to do it for like every category. Like nobody expects you to pay your bills in cash. Like that can, I mean nobody wants to do that, right? So it's just, you can start with like one or two categories and kind of test it out and see if you like that or not.

The important thing is to find what works for you right. In your situation. So you know, I like to use a spreadsheet for certain things. I use a notebook for certain things. I use cash envelopes but I also have digital envelopes. Like I just, for my brain I've had to figure out what works for me and it's like these little things so don't feel like you have to do it one way.

Like you might like having the notebook but you also like having a spreadsheet for certain things. So it's really finding the combination of what works for you. And especially since you know you're in the UK so things are a little bit different there so you know you may not wanna do certain things or you know, if you're a visual person you may be fine with a spreadsheet or you know what I mean?

So just figure out what works for you by trying different things and know it's gonna take practice and it's gonna take time. So don't be afraid to start cuz you feel like you're not sure what to do or which thing to do. Cuz we overthink everything. We overthink all of it and truly it doesn't matter as long as you're taking action and trying something that is progress and you will get there.

But if you stay stuck and don't do anything, you won't. Right? You have to like just start doing and just start trying to figure it out. So I love that you're here cuz that's what you're trying to do. So I'm really excited for you and this year cuz it's the beginning of 2023, so I would love to follow up with you in a few months and see where you're at and how things are going.

But what is something that you could do in the next 24 hours that you think would help you with this? It could be just getting a notebook. It could be figuring out what categories you wanna use for cash, if you're gonna use cash or setting up kind of an electronic way to organize the amounts. So what are you thinking, what can you do?

The notebook, the small notebook and it comes everywhere with me because I have tried to put every receipt in my bag and then receipt and I'm like, and then I'm forgot in the notebook work really well so, and get a notebook especially. And I think the cash envelopes would be really good for me because over here we do a lot of debit card and a mixture of cash.

Oh okay good. I find that cash is very different. I tried to hold onto my cash. Yep. You know today and I was like how much cash have I got? Right? Okay, what did you bar? We bought something earlier and oh we just bought some, sorry we bought some chips and I was like, we're not spending any more than five pounds,

you know and so I've become like tight when? When Yes like It's like it's not real money with a card. Right. And so mentally it it, I do the same thing, it's so hard to hand over the cash and it's like I'll put stuff back in the store and be like, I don't really want to spend my money on this, but when it's a card we don't think about,

we just swipe it. So wait, because we were, we were coming back home, my son was like, oh I wanted to drink and no we've got drinks at home. So because I was like, we're not spending any more than, so we just bought some chips and I got, it was like two pounds so I got no it was three pounds so I got two pounds back and we have drinks at home so I was like that's good.

So yeah, I think is gonna work. Yeah, I think so too. I think both of those things will really help you. And so if you haven't already with your budget, just kind of make a priority list since you have different money coming in at different times and kind of try to plan like if, if you know the money's coming on a certain date,

like a fixed date, which I assume probably most of that does for the most part. Yeah. Then you can say, okay when this money comes in I'm gonna put it towards this, this, and this. So just be really specific with your plan so that when the money comes in you don't have to think about it and it's not, oh I'll just do whatever and then the money's gone type of thing.

So it sounds like you have a really good head start on, you know, your mindset and things like that. So I'm really excited to see what you do with the cash and the notebook. Cuz I feel like just from talking to you this little bit that you are going to be very successful and take action right away. I hope so. Carry on the way that I'm doing,

you know when you've got a child and you are responsible Yep. You Can't mess up. So Yeah. Yeah. And you know when you have more income coming in, once you kind of get this foundational stuff, as long as you carry it over and don't get like too relaxed, then you're gonna be able to like really invest and make some big,

big financial goals happen. So that's awesome. So that's good to hear because you know, that's obviously the next step. Now just get back or again. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. So do you have any other questions or anything else you wanna talk about before we wrap up? No, I feel like I could ask you so many questions, but I think actually it's just about breaking it down and just concentrating on the things that you have said and then I can speak to you about,

you know, like 200 pounds on that credit card but I, I'm not gonna have any money unless I do this, so I can't think about that. Yeah, exactly. One thing at a time focus on one thing because otherwise we just get overwhelmed by all the things and don't know what to focus on. So that's good. I dunno, maybe this,

the question I run three bank accounts. You have what? Three bank accounts and I don't think I utilize them very well. So maybe that would be good. There's one bank account that all my direct debits go outta and I've got them all at the same day. Okay. So that's that one that's got an overdraft on. Okay. Which is really hard come out of your overdraft.

So I think that would be my first, once I've got this, I think that would be my first goal. And then I've just got another two and what I tend to do is money comes in and I just get it out so that I've got money for the money. So is there a way that I could utilize those three bank accounts better? That makes any sense?

Yeah, probably. So I like the idea of having everything come out of one account. So it's kind of like your money in money out account and the other two could be used as, you know, different spending accounts kind of like the cash envelopes but in a digital way. So you could have, you could have just like your extra spending like food and eating out kind of like the variable expenses.

And then the other one could be for any expenses that you just know you want to save for like birthday, Christmas holidays, vaca, you know, other longer term I guess, or not month to month, but one could be just like your spending account and then when the money's gone, it's gone and then you, you could use it kinda like a digital envelope and then the other one could be just the in and out like you already are doing.

So if that works for you, if you like that, you could definitely do that. The only thing with that is you still need to have a specific plan for what you need to spend out of that account. Cuz if it just goes all into one pot, you could accidentally spend money you need for food on something else. So you still gotta kind of have an idea and a plan for what your budget is for those categories in that account as well.

Which you could do in a spreadsheet or just on, you know, pen and paper. So that kind of is up to you with, you know how I talked about the tracking with the column, the extra column. So you could kind of do that and just have it in the one account though, if that makes sense. So then you're not spending your bills money on accident,

like if that ever happens to you. So you could have the like the Bills account and then the spending account and then the savings account. Okay. That sounds really good. Awesome. Thank you. You're welcome. Anything else? No, I feel like that's something I can start doing, you know, tomorrow when we go out. Awesome. Yes.

That's awesome. Well thank you for coming on the, or on a budget for a budget strategy session. I appreciate you taking the time and being willing to show up for us. Thank You. Now if you love the budget strategy session episodes and you want one yourself, you need some support in getting on track with your finances and whatever you are struggling with,

don't forget you can come on the podcast with me as well. You can do your own budget strategy session now. Just go to budgets made easy.com/strategy to pick your time to come and meet with me one-on-one in your own budget strategy session so that you can get your questions answered and get past this feeling of being stuck and just get going. Let's do it.

This is the year that you can make real change in your life and your finances. So come join me, save your seat@budmadeeasy.com slash strategy. Talk to you.