And welcome to the money mindset podcast, where you will find the inspiration and motivation. You need to manage your money better. So you can stress less as living the life you want. It's Ashley with budgets Finisi and the money mindset podcast. And today I am so excited to share the story of Tiffany Cantrell. So she's going to share her story about how she started managing her finances after her divorce. And so she was married for over 20 years with her husband for 24 years. And she had to basically start all over with her finances and she shares how she was able to do that ways that she makes extra money to help her reach her financial goals. And, you know, some inspiration for you as well. If you are struggling with getting started on your finances, or maybe if you are going through a divorce or thinking about divorce and, and you're not sure that you can do it on your own, you know, she shares what kind of has kept her going through the past couple of years since the divorce and how she's been able to still maintain her financial goals, even when she didn't think that she could. But before we dive into today's episode, I want to remind you that if you are ready to get started with your finances and you are ready to take that first step, be sure to grab the free budget starter kit. It's a printable guide with a checklist and some monthly reminders for what to put into your budget. It is free. Go to budgets, made easy.com/start. And here is my interview with Tiffany. Hi, Tiffany. Thank you so much for being with us today. Hi, thanks for having me Well, and I am so excited to share your story because on this podcast and on my website, budget's made easy. I love sharing other people's stories about how they have overcome money challenges and paid off debt and all those kinds of things, because it helps inspire others. And so I know that your story today is really going to inspire others that are, have been in a situation just like yours to hopefully get on a better track and kind of, you know, start that journey. Awesome. Yeah, I hope so as well. So before we kind of dive into the nitty gritty details, can you just kind of give us a little bit of background about yourself? I mean, you know, kind of like how your financial journey started? Sure. So I really kind of started, I guess when I was 16, I asked for my parents for my first credit card because I had always been brought up that credit was really, really for a wide variety of reasons. And I didn't know a lot about it, but I just knew that I needed to start developing my own credit. So they co-signed for me to get a credit card of $500 with the maximum limit. And so I started to use that for, you know, clothes when I was in high school and used my money that I worked from my job to pay it off each month and so on and so forth. And then it was interesting because I went off to college and my parents did not pay for my education. And so I couldn't work as much as I probably would have liked to pay for everything for college, because, you know, you just can't pay for everything with tuition and books and living. And so I ended up getting a lot of student loans, kinda got myself into an interesting situation because I was getting more student loans than I needed. And I was, I just needed, I guess, more time to study than the average person. And so I found myself, you know, they, those long companies they'll give you whatever you want pretty much. So I spent my years in college just basically kind of getting my way into student loan debt unnecessarily. And when I, when I graduated and I had met my soon to be husband at the time, he was like, what, what kind of student loan debt do you have? And I was like, well, it's not that bad. And so we spent a lot of time trying to double up on payments and get that taken care of. Fortunately, I was able, because I was working full time, I was able to pay for my master's degree cash. So I didn't go further debt for that. Yeah. So that was, that was really nice, but it, you know, it was also that from the help of having a significant other to, you know, help with all the other bills and stuff, I know it's really challenging when you're trying to do everything yourself. So that's kind of a little bit about that. And then my, my husband and I were very conscientious with money. We, we didn't make a lot of money at first and then years went by and we started to gradually make more as our careers developed. And he came from a very, very poor family. And so he didn't ever have anything as a child. And so we just worked really hard to be mindful with our money, not being debt, paid our credit cards in full every month, so on and so forth. And it was interesting because when we were married for 20 years. And so when I decided that I wanted to split from him, I think he was really concerned about how much I might take home from what we had grown, you know, what we had developed and savings and all, and that wasn't my intention at all, but certainly was a concern of his. And so he, he, for a long time, while we were married said, you know, it wasn't going to be able to make it on my own. I didn't make enough money. I wouldn't live the same lifestyle that I had become accustomed to living. And in my mind that was just like, you know, that's not going to be a deterrent to what I think is going to bring you more happiness, not being married. He was very controlling with our money. On fact, I became a yoga teacher and he did not want to pay for my training for yoga. And I just said, well, I'm going to do it anyway, put it on a credit card. And then once I started making money from yoga, paid that card off and kind of kept the yoga money for myself, which was also very empowering for me because I just never felt like through the marriage, I had any money for myself, even though we had plenty of savings and we're mindful. And so when we went to go to split, he was just like, you're never gonna make it. And, you know, almost like I felt like, sort of threatening me or, or would be the word, just kind of convinced and thinking, you know, let me think I had to stay in the marriage because I wasn't going to be able to take care of myself. So I left anyway, I took very minimal things and just sort of, kind of started on my own from scratch, like minimal furniture, et cetera. And I had, I got an apartment obviously at first and I realized pretty quickly that my apartment was not helping me, but it was taking basically almost a whole paycheck a month to pay the rent. So I decided pretty quickly to once the divorce was final to purchase a home and my intention with the homeless to use it as sort of an income producing thing for me. So I knew I was going to sacrifice some, some privacy and I was actually okay with that sort of as a means to an end, but I decided to Airbnb, one of the rooms in my home, I had two extra rooms. And so I, I really was very, I feel like, you know how you put something out in the universe and you're like, this is, this is what I want. So I said to myself at the time, what do I need to make, make my finances where I want them to be. So I said, I want eight 50 a month from the Airbnb. And literally that's exactly what I got every single month. It was amazing. The room was booked almost like a year straight. It was crazy. And so through that money, I used it to like fix the house up. So I purchased the inquiry, took inventory homes. So it was very, it had nothing, it was stark. It had like, you know, no Chrome molding, no backsplash, no lighting, no ceiling fans, no pain And build their basic Basic. Yeah. So I gradually used that Airbnb money to like dress the house up, make it cute, take my time. So that I, again, I wasn't going into debt to do those things. And so I just, I don't know, through that process backing up a little bit at work. I was really, really nervous. Like I had really bad anxiety when I was first splitting. Like, how am I going to manage money? Because I had just not done it for 20 years. You know, we had made money and my husband always managed it. And so I just didn't know anything about it. And I'm, I was a computer teacher at the time and one of my cohort teachers, she said, she was like, TIF, why don't you just build a spreadsheet? And I was like, well, okay. So I just wrote down in the spreadsheet, all of my bills, I built a section called miscellaneous where anything that happens, you know, how stuff is or anything I purchased kind of, that's a standard bill would filter into the miscellaneous column and then pull off of the total built a section that has like all my incoming money from my checks to my yoga money, to my Airbnb money. And I th the nice thing about the spreadsheet was I, I programmed it in such a way that all I have to do is type in the number and the I'd always know where I stand financially and I can see, and I have the spreadsheets from the very first month I had to pay my own bills all the way to now, which that was back in 2017. So I have all of those spreadsheets and I can see over time, like, where do I waste money? How can I do better? How I spend more in certain areas and, and those types of things. And it's really interesting to like, eyeball that. I mean, I, if I spend like cash for my purse, I'll put it in the spreadsheet as cash. And so that's pretty much what really, I think has empowered me. It's like, just always knowing where I stand, not ever having to worry, because it's already, blueprinted on paper. I'll have to do is pull the file up. And so, yeah, so that's kind of in a nutshell. Yeah. And I, I, you know, I'm so glad that you mentioned that it empowered you, like knowing the numbers, because I feel like so many people that I speak to on a daily basis, they're overwhelmed and they're scared to look at the numbers. And so then it just snowballs into anxiety and putting it off and procrastination, and then we just make it bigger and bigger ordeal in our mind, you know, but when you actually like, just face it and take that step to actually write it down, either like you in the spreadsheet or on paper, it is empowering. So how did you, you know, with all, you know, maybe the doubts or him telling you, you can't do it. How did you like face that? And what did you tell yourself to just do it? Well, I think I just sort of, you know, there's those things in life where you just have no choice, whether you want to or not, it's just something that has to be done. And so when I knew I wanted to leave the marriage, because I wasn't truly happy, I knew that I couldn't be afraid. And that's something I think that a lot of people struggle with is, you know, just being afraid of like, well, I couldn't stay because I'm too scared to go out and do this because you know, it, it, it, it has the appearance of the fact that I'm not going to be successful, but I, I just had to kind of power through that and not let that stop me and just work on it myself and, you know, just one step at a time and just know that I could do it like a constant, like reassurance to myself. Like you can do this, you've got this, put the tools in place to, to make things, as you said, like less stressful, more effortless, easier, more mindful. And, and I agree, like I have lots of friends as I've talked finances with people and, you know, lots and lots of friends who are just sort of this avoidant behavior. One of my good friends, I'm like, Hey, just show me or just show me your spending. Just show me your bills. Just show me what you bring in. Let's see where you're at. And she just doesn't want to reveal the information. And thus, she, I can't help her. I, you know, it's sort of, to some degree, people are embarrassed. They're ashamed. Yes. And again, it's sometimes you would think like, for me, for me to see her, for example, living in this avoidant behavior, knowing that I know it's stressful for her. And again, like you said, it just compounds the situation. It's stresses me out, worse for her to not know where she stands and know that there is a fix if she just opened herself up and I teach a lot of yoga. So I'll always say open yourself up to something new. Like, you can't do the same thing over and over and expect a different result. You have to look at doing something different. And I think, you know, like anything else, like when I have a situation, I'll talk to a friend and they might see it in a different way. So same thing with finances, like open yourself up to conversations and, and don't be afraid or scared or ashamed because it's all fixable and you have to learn, you know, what are you doing wrong? And what tools can you put in place that are going to help you be in a position to do better? And some of that I think is just awareness, just aware of where do you waste money? Where could you spend less, what things are needs and what things are half tos, you know, those types of things. Yeah. And I'm glad that you mentioned that everything is fixable because I feel like a lot of people feel like no matter what they do, they can't fix it or that they're going to fail anyway. So why even bother trying? So I love that you said it every, you know, that it's fixable because you can, you just have to start and you have to start by facing the numbers. So I do have a quick question for you, if you don't mind. Anyway, I'm curious how, if you could go back in time, you know, we always say hindsight is 2020. If you could go back in time and tell your younger self, when you're getting married, like your husband handled all the finances. Is that anything that you would change, like where you were, would be more involved with the finances? So the way we did our money, I mean, I felt to some degree I was involved in a way we, I would go and I would go to the grocery store and I did a lot of errands cause he worked a lot. And so I would write down on a piece of paper at the end of the week, like Friday or Saturday, you know, I would write down for him. Here's what, here's what happened this week. And I would write down what, what paychecks I brought in and how much those were. So I kind of ran the checkbook side of things and I did the bill paying and all of that. And he did the management of like, how much are we putting in savings? So we did, we did to some degree of a partnership, but I just, I was more like the secretary, you know, here's what's going on. And he was the more, he was more of the manipulator of, of how things were working. I will say it was funny because, you know, early on, I was like, we as like, we need a financial advisor once we got to a certain point and he listened to that, or I was like, we had a home that we had rented and we were handing money. You know, we were handling like a, month's rent away to a realtor to rent the property. And I'm like, Hey, that's a waste of money. I should get my real estate license so I can make it to the property and we don't have to pay someone else a month of the rent. And so it was kind of funny because I didn't realize until after I was not around him, that I was actually more of the brainchild when it came to certain ideas and outside of the box, ways of thinking, then I had been given credit for all those years. And I was sort of the, I guess, I don't know the energy around it or the idea girl or the creative person in like, Hey, we could do this. Hey, we could do that. And I don't think that he gave me the proper credit for that, if that makes sense. But I think one of, some of the things I would have done probably differently to answer your question better is I would have had more of a hand in like, you know, how, how things work. And he would explain it to me in the way in which he did it, but I just didn't understand it. I think the spreadsheet and having things written down in a visual way helped me. He was a numbers guy, so he could do numbers in his head, whereas I couldn't follow. So I think in a relationship it's important to like, you know, each person to have their own autonomy when it comes to money, like sort of your own control over certain things. You know, obviously when you're married or in a relationship, you'll put money in together. But I think it's important to have your own, your own money, whether it's savings or, you know, separate credit card or separate count. Just so you have some ability to, I don't know the word, I guess just, you know, you have some role in your choices and how things work. Yeah, absolutely. And I'm curious what made you decide to, or take the leap for an Airbnb? Cause I can imagine, you know, especially for me, if I were single and a woman I'd be nervous about running out of bedrooms. So was there anything like any, anything that kind of, you had to overcome to do that or was that, has everything been like smooth sailing and fine? So for me I'm very extroverted. So I think one of the things I really struggled with and had a lot of anxiety early on when I got divorced was not having anyone in the home. Like no one was coming in, no one was leaving except for me. And I just had a really hard time with that. Like I just really did a lot of work on that. And so it was sort of a kind of double-edged side where I knew I was going to bring John income in, but I also knew that whether Airbnb person talk to me much or hung out in the common areas or anything, there was someone be someone would be coming and going. And I wouldn't just be by myself all the time. I had rented Airbnbs for years and years. And so I was comfortable with the company itself. Another thing that I thought kind of helped me decide was I didn't at the time on a standard roommate, because with roommates, you can't control who they have in and out. It's their house too. With Airbnb, you have some sort of control of like, you know, you can be in this area, but only around these times, you know? So there's a little bit of, yeah, there's a little bit of control. Like they, you know, they can't, I have it where they can't invite other people over because I did have one girl that had like a party one evening and I was trying to go to sleep and she'll be like four people in the house and they were all talking and hanging out. And so after that person stayed, I was just like, you know, you can't have, you can't have other guests except with permission so that I have some control over that. And another thing it did for me too, is some of the people like I literally hung out with, I was like, let's go to this thing that they're having downtown or let's go to a polo match. And I would like if they were game and wanted something to do and you know, didn't have much going on, I would invite them to participate in things that I was doing. So I met a lot of really cool people from really airy, really great like areas of the world and became actual friends and, and have kept in touch with many of them. So that was a great experience for me. Oh, that's awesome. See, I'm an introvert. So I cannot even imagine, imagine doing that here, even like, you know, inviting them to go do stuff, but I could see, especially as an extrovert, how you would need that interaction. And that's actually a really cool idea. So now I have a different way of thinking about it whenever, like to suggest other people to make extra money with Airbnb. So do you have any other tips for managing an Airbnb? Cause you gave us some great ones already. Yeah. So there's just lots of ways to make money doing it. You can refer other people as a host and you can make pretty good money that way. So I've referred a few other people. Yeah. You just give them a link and then tell them where to register. And then if they do it with that link, then you'll get a credit. It's like, I don't know. I mean, you just have to kind of think one of my friends did it down in the Venice, Florida area. He had, he had a property kind of like mine and he had an extra room and he was like, yeah, if I want to do this too. And his was to pay off some money that he had to from his lawyers in the divorce and he get himself out of debt. And so he did it and I just went down to his place and like looked at the room and I was like, Hey, these are, these are things you need to make someone feel more comfortable. Like you need a trash can in the room. Like things you might not think about it. You didn't actually stay in the room. So just thinking about like, what would it, what would you need if you were to be staying somewhere? And yeah, I mean, really that's kinda just the best way to look at it. You've got to, you know, let them know how to get in and out of the house. Always keep mine in a lock box. I actually got locked out of an Airbnb one time that I was staying in and there was no extra key. And the girl that I was staying with had was out of town for the weekend. And it was like a big mess for me to try to get back in the house. So I always leave an extra lock box outside of the property so that if someone does accidentally lock themselves out or something, they, they can still get in the house. If I'm like off doing my own thing, those types of things would be probably things you wouldn't think about that might be good tips or tricks. Yeah. That's a great idea. So are you still doing the Airbnb? I am. I am still, still doing it. Yeah. It's, it's, it's interesting. You know, you do have different types of people that come in and some are very they're, everybody's different, you know, that's one thing you have to realize everybody's different. And, and so some have never stayed in an Airbnb before. And so that's, that's interesting because they don't really know how to live with someone else. Like they come from, you know, their own home and they're like, oh, Airbnb, it's very reasonable to stay somewhere. I mean, my rate is like 60 bucks a night, roughly. So, and you know, but if you were to try to stay in a hotel right now in this area, you'd be spending well over $300 a night. So it's a great place. It's a great way to travel at a, at a cheaper rate. And you can get Airbnbs that are shared spaces or you can get one that's a whole house. So there's lots of ways to look at it too. Yeah. I haven't stayed in one cause we don't, we just don't travel that much, but I've looked at them for some trips and all the ones I've looked at, I believe we're like to rent the whole house, not just one room, but yeah. I know some people that do just the one, you know, the one space or shared a space. So yeah, I love that you brought that up and that, that has helped you be successful with your finances. And so it sounds like you didn't really have any debt or anything, like moving out of the divorce. So you were just kind of trying to get yourself on track with managing the change in finances and staying on track, that type of thing. Correct? Yes. I didn't have any because we, we didn't have any, what I did, my goal was to stay out of debt and that was what I think was most concerning is like, how can I have like the same lifestyle and still be able to save money and stay out of debt? I just didn't see it as I was just very, very nervous that it wasn't possible for me. And I think that was one of my other fears is just like, you know, some of it is, you know, sometimes people experience things from their parents and or friends or other family members or where you're told a certain type of thing. And then it makes you sort of believe it. And I think that that's where a lot of people's work is. It's just not to believe what people tell you that that is not necessarily a good thing. Like people can always try to pull you down because they're not good at something doesn't mean that you can't be. And so I think that's what happened for me is like just constantly working on my self to say, I can do this. I'm creative, I'm smart enough. Like just really boosting my own energy and empowerment up too. And then once I, you know, once I got going and I was like, whoa, like look at me. And I've even talked to my ex husband and we, you know, we still talk from time to time and he's like, wait, what are you doing? Or like, I refinanced my home because the interest rates were super low. And he was like, wait, what? The interest rates are that low. And I'm like, yeah, go look. And he was like, and then the next thing you know, he refund it is, it was really kind of funny some of the things that happen in the end because he was just used to my creativity and my outside of box thinking. And he didn't have that anymore when I wasn't there. So yeah. There's and there's lots of things you can do. Like, you know, people think that credit cards are, you know, sometimes people think of them as debt debt producing, where you put them on a credit card, you don't pay it off every month. You know, then you've got this huge amount of interest and the interest is, is no joke on credit cards. I mean, they run sometimes up 25%. It's just insane. So one of the things I like to tell people is that you can use your credit cards to make money for you instead of you making money or going in debt with them. And so there's lots of credit cards that I like. I have like four different cards and I use them for different things specifically to maximize, maximize my rewards. And I have one that I really love. It's a, it's a capital one saver card and it is it's, it, it produces like 4% cash back on dining and restaurants. I like to go out and eat a lot and hang out and socialize. And so I use that pretty much for everything. I have a Costco card and Costco is great for Costco itself, but it's also the best one that I've found for gas kickbacks, which we know how expensive guesses right now. It's just insane. And then I have a travel one, which I'm currently playing with right now. I'm not sure if I'll keep it more than a year because the annual fee is pretty steep, but I figured, well, if I get two or three free flights off that annual fee, then it's, it's a balance. And then I have an Amazon card that obviously I used to use a lot for Amazon and get the Amazon points and stuff. So those are sort of my favorite credit cards, but all of my cards produce money or checks for me. You know, they, they all pay out differently, you know, and I love the ones like the capital one. You can take the money, you can take the cash. Like if it's a hundred, some months I get a hundred and some dollars for the rewards, or you can just take that money and put it on your ballots. So that it's just like, it's just paying pay kind of paying yourself back. Another thing that I did that is maybe interesting for people to know is I had like a, I think I owed like six grand on my car. So I didn't save that much money on interest. Cause my interest on my car was really low. So some of you got to balance between, should you keep the cash in the bank or can you keep it, would it be okay to release it? Like, are you going to need it for something else? But I was, I was okay. Releasing it. So I paid my car off and now what I do is I take my car payment and I pay myself back. So it saved me some interest rate money, and then I'm just banking that money so that when I do purchase a new car, I can use that money as the down payment, in addition to either selling on outright or trading it in. So kind of different ways to think about like, don't just pay your car off and then just, and then just spend the payment, you know, just pay it off and then put that payment that you're used to paying back in the bank so that it it's, it can act as a down payment for your next car. That's really smart. So as we wrap up here, I do, I am curious what you would say. And I have an idea because I feel like you've probably already said it and it was so good. I want to reiterate it here at the end. But if you were speaking to somebody that is in your situation, divorce, after being married 20 years and kind of getting back out on their own and figuring things out for themselves, what would you tell them to kind of inspire and motivate them to just do it and, and keep going? I would say, do not be afraid. I feel like we're all afraid of different things like me living alone or me not being able to live the life that I wanted, you know, and not having somebody to hang out with, not having some comics, someone come into the house by think that the only way through, in my experience through fear is that the only way through it is to do it. So if you sit back and say, I can't, I can't, I'm afraid, I'm afraid. You just never gonna get anywhere. And you're always going to be afraid of that same thing. So I would just say, don't be afraid and get yourself, like, get the help that you need. Like if you don't know how to run your bills higher and get a financial coach to help you learn how to do that in the right way and let them teach you how in a way that works for you. Like the way that my husband did to the bills, I didn't understand that it was not gonna work for me. So I had to find my own way to do things that worked for me. And sometimes it takes like the girl that worked, Tony built a spreadsheet that I had never thought about. You know, it takes, it takes conversations and help from other people to, to get you the tools that you need to, to manage everything that you need. And I think to at least like that spreadsheet, you know, I didn't have a financial coach at the time. What that spreadsheet was. It was sort of, what would you say? Like I'm gonna, I wouldn't say not empowerment but accountability. So that spreadsheet made me accountable because I could tell when I dropped low and money and I was like only saved a couple hundred dollars last month, like Lori do and TIF, you know, and like, where did us, where did I waste money? I think that if find a tool, a person, whatever it is that holds you accountable and not go into like the shutdown mode that a lot of people do where they don't communicate, they don't talk out loud about it. They hide it. And then, then obviously just things compound compound compound, because what they're currently doing, isn't working and they're afraid or embarrassed to open up about it. So I think not being afraid to do whatever it is that you need to do to get yourself in a position that you can be successful with your money on your own. And it's completely possible. Oh yes. Thank you. That's the perfect. So where can people connect with you or find more about you? So I'm just getting started in financial coaching personally, after, after kind of sitting around for two years going, I should do that. I should do that. And then just not, and one day I was like, why do I keep thinking about this? And I'm not doing it like, so right now I just have my email address. It's Tiffany L. Cantrell at Gmail. So it's spelled T I F F a N Y L for my middle name, Cantrell, C a N T R E L L at Gmail. I'm also on Instagram. And that one's a little more interesting. Let me pull that up really quickly. I have it listed as financial underscore coaching underscore with underscore TLC. So basically financial coaching with CLC, which is my middle one, my initials. Awesome. And I will link to everything in the show notes as well. So you can just swipe up and hit the links to connect with Tiffany after you listened to this show. So I always ask people at the end, what is your favorite non-fiction book to kind of help inspire people and get them going and, you know, doing the things they know they need to do. So I it's funny, I always read books for knowledge and I like books that someone's recommended, or I see a line that's like, oh, I'll try that one out. And usually when I keep a book around, it's a good amount of time. And I share a lot of the wisdom that I pull when I teach my yoga classes. So this book that I have right now, and everybody always asks me when I use it. What does that look again? And it's funny, sometimes they'll hear it four or five classes, and then they'll, they'll be like, you keep reading from the same book. What is it? What is it I'm like, oh, so it's called the one life that we're given one, the one life we're given it's by mark Nepo. It's, it's kind of a series of little short excerpts that he has written and he has multiple books out. And I had, this is the only one that I've purchased from him that I've delved into, but other people have told me that they have some other books by the same author that are really amazing. And a lot of it is just experiences and ways to look at things and like, you know, really thinking your life here in the present moment and, you know, really tapping into like your magic and the reason that you're here and sharing your light with others. And it's just really, really empowering a good, and every single story I think speaks to me and other people in different ways, they're all kind of tailored to growth and the way that you see things in this world, Great. I'm going to have to check that one out. I always love it when I hear something new that I haven't, that I haven't heard of. Cause I hear a lot of the same books over and over. So I love it when I can, you know, be a little selfish and asking the question and getting a new book to check out. So I appreciate your time. This is wonderful. And I know that you are going to help inspire some others with their finances. And I hope you have a great day. Thank you so much for having me. Thanks. Thank you so much to Tiffany for sharing her story today. And I know inspiring some of you to take the leap and get started on your finances and you know, some inspiration and motivation from today's episode. And don't forget if you're ready to get started, go grab your free budget starter kit. A budget's made easy.com/start. And if you like join today's podcast, I would love it. If you shared it with somebody that you know, that can maybe take some inspiration from it as well. And you know, I'm always happy to see screenshots and tagging me on Instagram as well. So I know that you listened and that you enjoyed it. And I will talk to you guys next week.