00:00:00:00 - 00:00:53:16 Unknown Ladies and gentlemen, for the 781st time, the Mason and Friends show featuring that dude called Mike, a.k.a. his Black Hand. This year, as well as that dude called you a.k.a. his. And as well as juju, a.k.a. Junior Jew Brunets. Hello Me I am Mahoney, a.k.a. Mason. This welcome to the Mason and friend show was Harry was good out there today. 00:00:53:19 - 00:01:22:04 Unknown I fear you got it. Push the button for a lot of minute by like two or 3 seconds. You got to get a lot of heat, Jerry, before you start pouring, honey. Jeffrey, he died out on make for you that end and get get out on the ride there I for you. For you on that thing There So all fair we were talking about Mason if he had to themselves Oh, yeah, I don't remember how this started, but yeah, I don't remember some back clown we know you want to clone your show clown. 00:01:22:07 - 00:01:39:26 Unknown Ubu said she could clone herself. She wanted to clone herself for all of the work that she has to do for three separate by a clone. Myself, I've been running trains on bitches with my clone. Now, here's the thing with that. Now, are you right? Okay. Are you going to do like, Berman, Weezy? Like, you know, one fucking man's. 00:01:39:26 - 00:01:56:29 Unknown What? I would be the pussy. I mean, I think you, you, you. I don't know the fucker in the asshole. My clone beat up a pussy here like so. Balls are going to be sad, right? You know, really? I mean, if I got a bump balls, I suppose it'd be best to do it with a clone of myself. 00:01:57:02 - 00:02:14:08 Unknown Are you wearing like I'm wearing your finger trap style if I'm going. Okay. Okay. One, I want to women on myself. Yeah, I want on the front one. And, you know, so you'll be dapper at each other, like. Yeah, yeah. I really can't tell. What you're gonna do is when I set up a game of Battleship on a bitch back. 00:02:14:11 - 00:02:30:24 Unknown So I think he's done this battleship tonight. Fuck. Fucking stupid. So we. We want to clone Star getting more ass, and you know, why me? We're not going to hang out all the time. So it could happen. Who cares? I worry about all that. Hey, how are you? From the bench. At the same time, remain alone. I really need. 00:02:30:24 - 00:02:48:23 Unknown There's a clone so we can afford to live somewhere. Yeah, that's it. You go to your job. I go to my job. We'll stay in the same house and we like fuck the same bitches, and they won't even know he is with a slider. Now, I don't even really want to slide in. I just. I'm like, in a state of, like, not giving a fuck lately about much. 00:02:48:23 - 00:03:05:24 Unknown It's kind of nice. It's like I got a I kind of. I kind of look at it like, you know, like I'm on my own. I'm me, myself and I. They're like, I have been most of my life, and I don't really have any sort of expectation of, like, fine and bitches, you know, to hang out with on a regular. 00:03:05:27 - 00:03:26:16 Unknown Yeah. So, like, I just don't really give a shit. I get around doing my thing like, you know, I'm a vessel, you know, I'm a not and so I'm a visa to join your solitary, celibate life. Fuck fucking. Yeah, sure. I mean, you happens run across something. You run across. Yeah. As I said, I've always sort of played it like I just like looking at life like I. 00:03:26:16 - 00:03:44:16 Unknown Well, fuck, I got a couple things I can control. You know what the beautiful thing about? Like, putting your money into things like that are inanimate objects. Then I do nothing but pay you back in there and like, you put something, you know, he put some nice on your car, your car's nicer, you buy yourself some nice for the podcast. 00:03:44:22 - 00:04:00:28 Unknown Podcast is nicer. Yeah. Now. And I'm saying I'm like, it's a beautiful thing I got going in my life right now. Well, they can go. Congratulations on that. On a lot of ways. Now. I sent you all some more Instagram. This shit I just happened to run across it and it was stupid enough that I had to fucking cemetery. 00:04:01:00 - 00:04:15:20 Unknown Well, you know, you find all the dumbest things. Well, see, that's the thing at this point now, I don't think it's me finding it. I think it's the algorithm working with somebody like you, like. Yeah. Knows what you want is not even knows what. I like Google. I search because of the fucking show, you know what I'm saying? 00:04:15:22 - 00:04:40:03 Unknown But this dude over and fuck in England or so. Let me see. I'm a mom and make sure I get this right. If they going to work with me and let me pull that man, it will in the 25 year old Liam Brown pleads guilty this week to having sex with a cow in England now. Oh, he's on surveillance cameras. 00:04:40:03 - 00:05:00:25 Unknown Wasn't just from the back. Commissioner, I think I know how to follow my billionaire. Now he has a cow going on top from the back. He reverse cowgirl went to Calvin Lane. Now, now it went like there's no way. There's no. What the fuck this Make a bastard. And that is what being a tweeted from the scene confirmed what had occurred at the farm. 00:05:00:27 - 00:05:19:11 Unknown The farmers told the court the Browns Roses his work on the lamb and they knowing him since he was a kid. But here's the thing that always freaks me out. I keep my phone cow forever. But here's the thing It always freaks me out about these stories, though. Like. Like I get it. Sex is fun, right? If you don't fuck a cow, you can't put on a rubber. 00:05:19:13 - 00:05:50:00 Unknown It's a cow dog. When's the last time you think she watched her snatch? You want it out of your life? Put a rubber on me. Were a bad bird is bird flu and shit. And that's why I'm mad cow chicken about mad cow disease. I got mad cow disease. Absolutely worry about is being called literally to call on a big I guess there's a lot of things to be concerned cows in the sense you're sparking a lot of things to be concerned about when it comes to chicken or taking a cow. 00:05:50:03 - 00:06:12:18 Unknown But don't use a condom. If was Dr. Cow and I'm not hearing a dog in a cow where exactly, Exactly. They wouldn't have DNA evidence off. Oh, you know, the vaginal swab we took off the cow gave us your DNA. Yeah, like rub rubber on you. Sick fuck, Gay man. That's the cow rapist. Yeah. Yes, that's a beefy vagina. 00:06:12:18 - 00:06:43:10 Unknown No, that that's. That's really a roast beef vagina. Serious beef. Super beef. When you put your arm in, that doesn't taste like you seem to be cultured. Well, now that you're really not up, you know what that says to me? Maybe. Maybe you could deal with some bitches you be. Festen may be right, but if a dude can fuck a cow and come when another man can throw his arm fully up and every following offense to make a shocking a cow, you fucking fist like so you're thinking this man fucker is fucking just a fake big motherfucker, big thick dick. 00:06:43:13 - 00:06:59:20 Unknown I think he's willing to fuck anything. So the real is just this cow, though he's already in. Or he could be John going. He could be one of those. It could be now of a three in a quarter. You know, he he might have her blood flowing to that bitch. My boys stick their dick in a lot of things. 00:06:59:20 - 00:07:25:07 Unknown No, we don't. I'm like, I don't know all American of having like that's what fuck people I was American. I think that's I think there's a lot of things that fuck people up like walking into your parents fucking fuck to power. Yeah. If I was going to or if I was going to fuck a pie, I would probably keep it simple and get like a yeah, like McDonald's. 00:07:25:09 - 00:07:44:01 Unknown We're not going to McDonald's apple pie. How do you keep fucking the pie? Simple. There's no where you buy McDonald's apple pie. You take a bite and you work. That's it. That's a that's a part of the deal. Why are you gonna ruin the whole pie when you can just buy a fucking McDonald's apple pie? Get busy with that. 00:07:44:03 - 00:08:05:01 Unknown I would allow wrestling because they're making them smaller now. There was Wide Gap a couple years ago, but right now, now you might have to get to spread about. Yeah. Yeah. Huh. Right. Well, like I said, I went to school Want to do the end of the fucking to pay it. But he never came back after it came out that he tried this, paid for it. 00:08:05:03 - 00:08:28:29 Unknown There was a video circulating around my school of this girl. She's 15 and she had found herself fucking a cucumber and then fucking a flashlight. And the flashlight kept turning off and ah, so it was treachery. And we had this shit on VHS like people were assholes. Old school. Oh, we're making duplicate copies of this shit. And, like, getting it out at school is a really big deal. 00:08:28:29 - 00:08:48:28 Unknown This girl had to like. Yeah, that's child porn. Oh, yeah, That's scary shit. Like, I'm all for an adult. Made the video herself and gave it to her boyfriend. I look, I get it. But I'm not mad at her for being a horny little slut. But like you can't put that video out to your 18 young lady and you got to be 18 when you recorded it. 00:08:48:28 - 00:09:09:28 Unknown Yeah, I think our dad was like a cop, too. There were some like other are there? So usually college kids are friggin fucking just like the reverend's kids are freaky. I mean, yeah, they do some off the wall fucking shit because they're like, you know, you're supposed to be the perfect child. I stressed out. Yeah. They become more rebellious, like, Fuck you, I'm going out here and I'm getting a trade. 00:09:10:01 - 00:09:39:10 Unknown Ran on me, Dad. So I'm letting all these motherfuckers. Mugabe, this clown. Come on, My. Yeah, yeah. Whoa. At the same time, my shit. You all went there. That's. Yeah, that's good. You know, y'all made a mistake. He's constantly scared by that in a way that I would particularly go. Like. Like I was saying, man, I might just have to start the imperfect entertainment pornographic company or ask the handicapped chick to our handicapped. 00:09:39:11 - 00:09:58:20 Unknown Yeah, there was this handicapped African facility. All right, now, and this is on the Instagram from about to as soon as I find out who I sent it to because I found it, you sent me. I think I'm not in the 20 some funny stuff recently, but I don't think I'm a handicap and I'm about to send it right to you, too. 00:09:58:20 - 00:10:25:26 Unknown We said, Boy, here we go. Bam, handicapped you. It said, Man, ain't no way. Somebody said I f and I'm like, are all retarded. I'm like, Oh yeah, I give to it out and it goes into the comments is going to show the comments of what people were saying. Russian caption Yeah, I mean, Chromeo sexual, this is fucked up. 00:10:25:28 - 00:10:49:14 Unknown But look, we supported syndrome down brick now it's worked up. I might not like it. I can't even tell. Like I was still trying. I'm still trying to want it hard for the city. It hasn't come through all night long. Oh, okay. Just came through. Well, what I'm sure going on is like that every now and then. Go fuck yourself. 00:10:49:17 - 00:11:09:13 Unknown Turn your phones down, people. It's not my. My mom. Yeah, you self awareness. Yeah. I mean that shit where not working in. So you had a real guy names tag. It's always a small club right now so that. I don't know. I think it's all good. Yeah. We're all trying to look at the same thing on the internet, but I'm probably going to go to hell for. 00:11:09:14 - 00:11:32:12 Unknown But, you know. Hey, look, they made love to me. I was just going to say that, man, that. But my point is the video. Yeah, it's too short. The video with the RL fire. All right, well, that's going to be a new fucking thing on board. Say it. She looks good, but I can't get an assessment as to whether or not she looks good enough to really, like, want a boner, because then all the stuff she to me, she had doubts and that's what it says. 00:11:32:18 - 00:12:04:01 Unknown You shouldn't. Now how I look it's going to be new category important to that right is will be new category guilty yet will make you a terrible deal. Ask me when I start making for no more working with me. Work hard to believe I'm more evenly minded individuals. You know what I'm saying? Well, I just share with the world is behind is Down syndrome brother and he was probably had like the emotional maturity of probably like a fourth grader an IQ of maybe like probably a third grader. 00:12:04:03 - 00:12:26:02 Unknown Yeah. It's it's tough. You know, like my parents, though, like, I think the first varying degrees of it. Yeah. I hope that this girl who, like if she's posting this, she's positive. Okay, well, then, you know, good for her. I just hope it's not a situation where someone's exploiting her. Right. Like lady spirit saying now like, you're a Down syndrome thing. 00:12:26:04 - 00:12:49:18 Unknown Oh, here you are. Yeah, we're. Yeah, yeah. My, like, Britney Spears is, like, crazy. Bipolar. Beautiful, right? Like this whole Down syndrome. She was. She was beautiful as one pointed, like, because she was from in a day. Back in the day, she was absolutely like when she was would be pretty of someone just like, you know hosed her off. 00:12:49:20 - 00:13:12:05 Unknown You know there's such an old but you know, I like that I not like that baby If I can you just you know, there's something really sick about me because like, I'm totally turned on at the thought of hosing down Britney Spears and her. Like, I be like, Come on, let's go out in the back and hose you down, you fucking nasty, nasty. 00:13:12:08 - 00:13:34:12 Unknown Are you dirty girls? Are you dirty pop star? Let's go out behind the bar and where the hose is and scrub you down real good. And then we can, we can throw a little lie on you. Go upstairs. Shoot. She looks like she was sick. Britney. Look like she needs some like me. She got some meat on our national machinery that I mean, she's lost that. 00:13:34:12 - 00:13:51:17 Unknown She's too skinny. She looks like a crack. She's very she you know, she might be your cash. You got a get like my regular, you know, like she doesn't have, like, muscle town. She just looks really scared. That's rough. I there's a difference between, like, skinny and, like, toned and just skinny and, like, you look like you might feel overweight. 00:13:51:17 - 00:14:09:09 Unknown It sounds like she's skinny or not. I might break her. She's skinny enough that I'd banger and try not to break her, but I wouldn't like dater because I'm like, you're like, too frail. Yeah, you know what I mean? But if she was muscular, totally a dater, right? Yeah. Since you're another joint two this do rob a jewelry store with no arms in a wheelchair with a gun in the street. 00:14:09:11 - 00:14:33:12 Unknown Hurley said. Okay, Never be a center. He got his toe on the trigger. Yeah, Yeah, He's holding a gun with his feet. But he got this. He got to sit there. He got to, like, put the gun down and turn to chair with his foot. And I'm like, How are you able to like, he's got that? Who's the fucking rich dude that was in the fucking wheelchair that was talking on the computer? 00:14:33:15 - 00:14:58:19 Unknown Yes. Yeah, he got that steaming hot lean in the chair like this in the chair. So let me ask you this, because this goes back to the mentally capable, like the fully mentally sound, yet physically unable. Like, is that a porno category that you could fuck with? Nah, nah, man. Where I'm going to say, now what if what if Stephen Hawking had, like, the rock hard badass dick and he just had bitches come in and he would like, stop that dick? 00:14:58:19 - 00:15:19:03 Unknown And they'd be, like, sucking me staggering. Imagine it, like, in my closet. I've come across him. But I never wanted to be the dude in the porno. That would be hysterical as the only woman on the show right now, I can say I wouldn't do that. Yeah, but you're not a porn star with one hand, you bang him. 00:15:19:04 - 00:15:38:08 Unknown I would love to have a conversation with Stephen Hawking. I think he's brilliant and fascinating and very interesting, dude. However, I don't think I saw his dad. You know, I don't even care how famous and smart it is. Well, but there was a time where he was not physically unable. And he used to be Jersey Shore. He was super cute in that movie. 00:15:38:08 - 00:15:51:04 Unknown That little like what's because he was that dude, that super cute in real life to explain it. Yeah, they did a good job casting of course, they got to put a hot guy in to play that fucking weirdo. I mean, it got me thinking like, Hey, Stephen Hawking may have, you know, might have been it's sign, it's apt. 00:15:51:04 - 00:16:18:15 Unknown It might have been for the degenerative disorder. Exactly Like what degenerative disease that's going like. Like I got a question for you, Mike. Would you go dark now sort of saying say you meet Janet Jackson and she's like, I love you. I love you, too, Janet. And then she's like, But I have Stephen Hawking disease, and in 15 years I'm going to be in a wheelchair and not be able to talk. 00:16:18:18 - 00:16:42:08 Unknown Okay? That's my man. All right, let's go abroad. Let's say we don't get it in horror car accident. Well, we learn a lot from blinking, you know, a couple times. And I know it's the most you got to make it happen, right? Even the big contraption now, you can put people in it makes it worse. Sorry. Fuck. Yeah. 00:16:42:11 - 00:17:02:22 Unknown Yeah, yeah. But there's, like, ours. Although if Janet's in the thing and she's like, Put me in the sack, swing my lights. All right. Yeah, You know what I'm saying? Yeah, exactly right. Yeah, I'm in position in the next one. Yeah, Yeah. Because, I mean, like, I'm helping you. I'm taking pressure off of limbs and providing pleasure at the same time. 00:17:02:22 - 00:17:23:04 Unknown Like, she has a way. Like when you had to get the whole way around. Okay, See? Look, everybody's in agreement on this stuff. Yeah, look, man, it all started from me being stupid. We're not that far apart. Hey, yo, your boy had a glitch again, man, that's embarrassment for the lockup. He's having seizures, right? He needs to be taken out. 00:17:23:04 - 00:17:40:17 Unknown Is in seizures. Mitch McConnell. He's even had the seizures or he has a brain aneurysm. One of the two is Karma. Back to what I'm just saying. It's like you've got to stop doing stuff at a certain point. Like every time I see one of these old people in Congress, I'm always like, Man, if my parents were acting like that, I'll be like, Come on, Pop, we got to get you out. 00:17:40:20 - 00:18:00:03 Unknown We got to like, he's my brother, He's trying. And you know me. He just stood there. I'm sorry. What was this like? Just shit himself. It's like a little kid when they shouldn't have said, Dad, I get to create totally feasible, just an emergencies myself for people over the age of 17. Well, if you. What is that, Father? 00:18:00:03 - 00:18:30:24 Unknown Actually, how old is he something? Is he really? He's got to be mad. Well, Dianne Feinstein is like fucking 90 and she can't even, like, take care of herself in reality. But she's still a congressperson. Like, I don't agree with it. I'm just saying it's fucked up. It's McConnell. I used to fuck political advertisement when I worked in Georgetown for a year and holy shit money that that Mitch McConnell political teams paid to get and advertisements. 00:18:30:25 - 00:18:57:18 Unknown Oh yeah out there it was insane The fuckers 81 years old he's 81. 81. Yeah I think you should be 81 round the country. I just think he's too old. Go take a nap, Grandpa. I agree with you there. Sadly, black people that are actually able mind and body. Yes. And in touch with technology and touch with environmental awareness and touch with so many things just in touch with people in general. 00:18:57:20 - 00:19:17:29 Unknown I think that basic ability to communicate is really that is an important thing. I think it's an important thing. I'd be nice if there weren't so many racists in Congress. There had to. But you know, these motherfuckers now they just all this for it's like fucking to I look at them, it's like, you know, I can smell mothballs. 00:19:17:29 - 00:19:36:12 Unknown I can smell fucking old. Wolf said, Fuck it. Shit that old woman used to wear in church, but whatever that fucking shit was, I could smell it, you know? I mean, that's. That's them bitches with this white diamond mothballs air. That's the one that she would have to commercial where she was like, These have always brought me luck. 00:19:36:15 - 00:20:06:21 Unknown Yeah. Yeah. Taylor. Yeah, but the fucking Violet I the violet, my bitch. These are guys brought to me like, I'm looking that commercial up right now with her. I tell you what, though, this heat is threatening to come. It's going to be some shit assholes, armpits and every crevice and crack going to be spanking. Well, like, I mean, I'm really glad because I've. 00:20:06:22 - 00:20:23:28 Unknown I've changed out one of the seats in the Corvette to, like a 16 year newer seat, and they go and it has the ventilation where it blows. Oh, there you go. Oh, yeah. There you go. Keep going at my fucking end. I drove around all day today and that fucker not sweating when I would have been sweating in the old seat. 00:20:24:01 - 00:20:51:00 Unknown Hell, yeah. Plus the really cool thing is it's. It's such a much more stable scene. It's so much better. It's so much. It's like the cars totally new again. Like he drives so much better with that. Clean it up. Great city. I love it. Live your best life. Yeah, it's just Liz. Yeah, This is Liz. Not necessarily perfume commercial. 00:20:51:02 - 00:21:25:16 Unknown Really? Not so much fun, right? These always brought me none of them. White diamonds. The intriguing fragrance from Elizabeth Taylor exclusively at People's Right. Only at J.C. Penney tomorrow because of Congress. White Diamond News. Got to bring some Old Spice the original oil from somebody posted that clip 17 years ago on on YouTube. And I guarantee you that commercial was at least 17 years old. 00:21:25:17 - 00:21:45:21 Unknown Yeah, we found out. Yeah. Like, ain't nobody, nobody buying no Liz Taylor perfume that is under the age of 40. Yeah. I feel like there are women that still buy it, but they're they're they're at least 65 and up those right there are 64. That's 65. Okay. My mom is age. They get stuck in that one like, you know, this is my shit. 00:21:45:21 - 00:22:04:26 Unknown This is what I wear. What they put on too much of it was wearing white diamond. You got on to my hours. Damn how they put that much on. But then again, you know, when I was in high school, I wore bath and body works, warm vanilla, sugar. It was like my signature scent. But see, bath and body works that always got my fingers fucked up because you had that. 00:22:04:29 - 00:22:25:27 Unknown You had that. What was a watermelon cucumber? Shaved my fucking bridges from all of the shit and it was not right. No, I never wore that. It smelled like straight. Only water, strawberry sugar, all straight ahead of day college and guys like, you know, like I really like you, but you smell like my mom. And I was like, Oh, yeah, yeah, right. 00:22:25:29 - 00:22:45:14 Unknown Oh, stop wearing. Wait, way, way, way breaking out. I was like, I don't know. I always smell like, hold on. Did you still give it to smell like he didn't it? That guy had already given to him when he made the mom comment. Really? I was like, I like you, girl, but I appreciate you. Give me to Moody. 00:22:45:16 - 00:23:07:28 Unknown You definitely are. You made out? I think a amazing memorial actually. Did it or not. But either way I was like, Oh no. And I didn't want to wear it anymore. And I stopped wearing it as soon, Say, you smell like my mama. I think you're not a good thing. Nobody ever watched that back then. It would have been much nicer of him to say, You smell like old lady. 00:23:08:00 - 00:23:26:20 Unknown No, that would have been offensive. Know it would have been offensive, but it would have been nonspecific and it wouldn't be aired. You smell like my mom, chick. I just fucked. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That is weird. I'd be like, You smell like an old lady, right? I can't fuck with old ladies unless they're old lady. No, I want to know how to be like you, smiled the woman at church. 00:23:26:21 - 00:23:44:19 Unknown Now, not maybe. See, that's a nice way to say That's a nicer way to look here. Not every take as you smell like a librarian. You know what I'm saying? That's not right. That's like a little rough right now. I think the church, we go very good in the library and I like a lot of birdcages. It was this guy's mom. 00:23:44:19 - 00:24:03:28 Unknown I smelled like his mom, and I didn't want to smell like that anymore. So I left. Well, it's it it's almost like it's almost like perfumes need to be categorized by era. Where were you born? These are the ones you should optimally go for. That way you don't smell like. Like when you were 15 Drakkar Noir. Do you guys remember that? 00:24:03:28 - 00:24:36:25 Unknown Oh, man. Yeah. He's always smelled like That's it. That would that was that was like my church. I feel like I knew so many guys that smelled like That was. That was a church cologne. See, you have to learn. You got to know you're sin. I'm an anti cologne kind of guy like doesn't surprise me about like years ago I had a girlfriend that left me that I mean I understand, but she like this like green polo that I had and I would literally, like, spray it in the air and then wipe the little thing, like, right in between, like the middle of my neck or whatever, and just the slightest bit. 00:24:36:25 - 00:24:51:19 Unknown And when she'd get close to me, she could smell. And I, she really dug it, but she could smell it and I couldn't. So like if I like can smell it, I don't like it. So like I need it to be so subtle that I don't even know. Let's see. It's all about how you place it, where you place it and what use. 00:24:51:21 - 00:25:13:10 Unknown And that's why I put it right here. Because. Because then when she was close to me, yeah, she would. You know, that's where you put it. You put, you put your cologne right here. Born in someone your wrist. Right. You put it where you're going to sweat at this spot in between. Right. Tell us, are you listening with Collarbones come together, this little spot where you see some of these guys, maybe they they were doing all their clothes. 00:25:13:10 - 00:25:28:28 Unknown They like walk into it like a woman. You got to you got to put it on your skin where you're going to be fucking sweating because that's how it's triggered. That's how the pheromones. Pheromones. But the thing is, you got to understand that you're scent plus another set that you're putting on you creates and is great. Yeah, exactly. 00:25:28:28 - 00:25:43:11 Unknown So you got to find out what scent works for you. I don't even know if it's a nuisance. It's the excessive level that they put it on. I bet you I could rock almost any cologne and if I put it on in the method that I'm talking about, that a girl that's into me is going to dig the way I smell because they're ceremonies. 00:25:43:14 - 00:26:03:16 Unknown But it's also but it's also certain women like certain smells like I saw back in my day it was I had the dark or I had the pool or the aqua disco or. What was that that you had and that that shit was so that right. Kind of cool. So yeah, I wore a cool water cooler for work, you know. 00:26:03:16 - 00:26:26:06 Unknown I mean, but when I do out is Calvin Klein be nice my joint right there. Lovely. Then I got some Versace on the side, you know, and me for those, like, important dinner moments. You know what I'm saying? I'm going to wear Versace for important dinner moments, Right? You turn on glow. Yeah. This the glow I over. I'm sitting over here and I'm like, What do you wear for a night out? 00:26:26:08 - 00:26:44:09 Unknown You mean So if I have a Versace shirt, should I wear Versace cologne? No, you don't need to. I mean, my eyes are too, but you can. Maybe I. It all depends on, like what? Like I have colognes for certain things. We'll see. I saw something, and it was like me, too. You could buy, like, a sampler pack of colognes, right? 00:26:44:09 - 00:26:59:18 Unknown And I thought, Oh, that's interesting because like, literally Cologne, I use it so sparingly and so little that if I had like designer cologne sample pack, it would probably last me for the rest of my life. And I'd be like, Oh, well, I feel like today a little. What's that? C k b Is that what the kids are called? 00:26:59:25 - 00:27:27:27 Unknown But a little dab on and I keep moving like that. She would last me for ever. Do they actually have these like different mailing prescription services that you can sign up for and shit and they will give you like a little tiny tester bottle. That's good. It'll last you like 30 days, right? Yeah. And like, you just get a different scent like every month you can pick, like whatever color and the client, it's, I mean, you know, they charge you like, I think ten bucks a thing, but it's one of those like, do they give you, like, little samples? 00:27:27:29 - 00:27:44:01 Unknown I mean, they're like selling this bag for getting like a bottle of chapstick. Any one thing. It's a little banger that you give me. It's like my, my, my index finger. You give me one mike index finger, but I signed up for it for a little while. Honestly, there is a size bottle. You know there was a bag. 00:27:44:03 - 00:28:14:19 Unknown Yeah. That finger is not much cologne wise, but it's a lot. The booty hole where we're going worrying about a 17. That's 117 on that thing. Right there. Yeah. My ring finger is actually a 14 five. Are you serious? So you don't want that anything or eight on the end? Like my average age, she's like, I like dirty, but good God, when I was like a six old, like I have fingers. 00:28:14:20 - 00:28:33:23 Unknown Can you hear like, half the size of you? You know what's funny? What? I have no idea. You know, I like a ten, maybe 11. I think I like a nine. You know, I have no idea what the hell my finger would be. Yeah, I was thinking about getting, like, a tattoo of a ring on my ring finger because they say that, like, women dig dudes that are married. 00:28:33:29 - 00:28:54:02 Unknown So I just trust my hands. And I don't know, I thought about. Oh, I feel like that movie. That movie was really good. It was cute. Just go with it. Just when you thought about getting a wedding ring, just go to bars and, like, see what happens. There's a short social experiment. Yes, a full on social experiment. You're going to get hit online. 00:28:54:02 - 00:29:12:09 Unknown You just had a there's an end to now no lie and say you was married. She's dead. You know me. Oh, okay. I know. So are they. Or you give me like or you got to be more of an asshole. I got to you that house, which were pretty bad. Yeah, right. You still have to find a way. 00:29:12:09 - 00:29:31:17 Unknown Which is work questionnaire, which will turn a woman on more. Which this crazy bitches out here at the bar. They're like, due to wedding rent because this is their house dead. She's dead. That'll work for her. Yeah, but that makes her feel like she's giving you a choice because it means there's no competition, right? I'm like the guy. 00:29:31:20 - 00:29:51:23 Unknown That's my point. I feel like they like to me. Yeah, it's fine. I'll be better than your dead wife. Not like that doesn't exist. I think it's a different kind of competition. I'm sure. I'm sure you will be better than my dead wife. You know what I mean? But if I've got a wife at home and that's the reason I'm out drinking like this. 00:29:51:23 - 00:30:11:13 Unknown Seems like there's a lot of bitches out there, like dudes with the wedding rings. They're like, These have married motherfuckers. And I think what it is, is they can fuck them and not have to worry about them being like, Hey, let's go out again. I know this girl. This one, she wears a fake band on her finger. I remember the morning because I wanted their job one time and I was getting old. 00:30:11:13 - 00:30:29:17 Unknown She had signed a paper or whatever and I was like, Oh shit, you man. Finally, you know, the question is shit on you. And she was like, Fuck no. In the demo for the three months ago, that bitch wouldn't fucking propose my bill. Okay, How long was she with this dude? Seven years. Wow. Seven years is a long summer. 00:30:29:21 - 00:30:43:28 Unknown She said, Fuck this. She goes, Oh, when I bought myself this kind of vehicle and I put this ring on my finger, we were going to ring on your finger to choose my mother because I don't want my focus. Ha, Mama Shiva, I get tired of my business coming up to me. I don't want to deal with these motherfuckers. 00:30:44:03 - 00:31:08:29 Unknown Right? Right. Fair enough. So, yeah. Come on, man. I get my ring on for a long time after I split with my husband. Did it keep dudes away from me? Yeah. Wow. No, actually, I think Marty's actually approached me because they were like, Oh, you're married. And, like, what? Are you married? Yeah. Well, now I think that it was honestly, they probably were more looking for anything beyond, like, surface level flirting at this bar. 00:31:08:29 - 00:31:31:11 Unknown You know, I think it was like surface level flirting can be nice. Yeah. I'm usually like married women are pretty neglected. So married women, they lap up their table bars. They fucking love it. Love that shit when I like to girls night when I bartended, man, I would say started grinding up on everybody. I would say crazy things to married women because you can. 00:31:31:14 - 00:31:54:15 Unknown That's what I'm saying. I loved it. They'd go home and fuck the shit out of their husband afterwards. So. Yeah. Something else. Yeah, that's. That's pretty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That, that that could be. I mean, it could have been me a couple of times. Doesn't matter. American made money off this. I made more money off of my wedding ring than I fucking paid for that bitch. 00:31:54:18 - 00:32:06:07 Unknown Which was nice as fuck because I'm like, Man, I got to get rid of this moll. Fuck, I have diamonds in my shit. I'm like, man baller. Yeah. So fucking I run into this one, dude. And I was like, Yo, man, what did you do? What you written, where he goes, I'll make you pay for that bitch, man. 00:32:06:07 - 00:32:20:06 Unknown I got to say, you know, you know, it's funny. Y'all know harvest right back. Day harvest is like an ass as bitch to marry him. Yeah. And I was like, Man, you need to get that girl. And he's like, I can't do that. And I was like, Bro, get over fucking Kubrick's draconian and be like, It's a fake diamond. 00:32:20:06 - 00:32:43:03 Unknown But I love you, so I want to marry you. And one day I'll buy you a real diamond. But I want to get you something that looks nice. That is beyond my level of expenditure. Yeah, right. So I got you because it's nicer, it's fake, but it's nicer, and I'm not going to start worrying. Oh, you're set proposing, but not even like this is a real engagement ring. 00:32:43:03 - 00:32:58:18 Unknown It's a fake me Because I can give you a much, much nicer. I give you a much nicer diamond and save a lot of money. You know, I get you a much nicer way and shit. And I was like, because I didn't trust the bitch too. I was like, You shouldn't be fucking buying a ring for this fucking bitch. 00:32:58:18 - 00:33:16:04 Unknown You know what I mean? God, sure enough, they made it out a year and a half, two years and got divorced and I can actually ever settle. Abra, Did you see? I told you so. I did. I was like, Oh, that's how you should get your salary. And I was like, Brad tells you, you got to give me. 00:33:16:04 - 00:33:34:19 Unknown Zakaria was a look. My brother did to say shit to me. I said to my brother, my brother did the exact same shit to me, you to get to Cuba if we were going to do it. So he told me, man, don't fuck with that bitch because there's something wrong with her. There's something that's not right. And I want to bring, you know, somebody right now. 00:33:34:21 - 00:33:55:16 Unknown What the fuck? You know, I fucking all these crazy bitch, that bitch right there. There's something wrong with her. Don't marry her. That's what was wrong. You ain't. Listen. I'm fucked. She was just a trifling. I well, my brother was like, Yeah. And they went fucking all the shit and I'm fucking like, go through shift stress and fucking crying. 00:33:55:16 - 00:34:12:15 Unknown All my kids came. See this one phone. Call them what it tells you. Yeah. Was your way. The guy holding the heater shit while at the same time you know why we say these things? Because they. They already know. Know? So you'll listen the next time? At the time I told you to get a season for your fucking stupid ass ex-wife. 00:34:12:17 - 00:34:30:07 Unknown Yeah. Get a phone. Can see. This is how I know that I'm good this go round because my brother already considers die from bone cyst delay. He calls his sister. He loves her to death like I'm like shit. And I told her unit first one that he's ever done shit like that for all the rest of them. Maybe you should like this for like my uncle. 00:34:30:14 - 00:34:39:01 Unknown I was out, and he's the one that fostered two crazy bitches. Yeah. All right. And, Mike, you doing all right for yourself. Okay. 00:34:39:04 - 00:34:57:10 Unknown All right, all right. Undulations dust for bubble. And when is the wedding, anyway? We're shooting for next year. Probably in the fall, but we haven't come up with shit yet. We still gotta find a venue, man. Like it's been hacked in process of trying to find a place, you know, because post-COVID prices are fucking stupid, you know? You know what we can do for you? 00:34:57:10 - 00:35:27:16 Unknown We can have your your version of downtown play at your wedding. Oh, that. I may go work and have one Now, back. Oh, listen, gentlemen, next week we're going to be premiering Mike's version of Pound Town, the parody exclusive actually taste, right? Take a trip down that track over the wedding. You are laughing. Mentos, man. I'm not sucking on the. 00:35:27:22 - 00:35:50:28 Unknown Yeah, he's talking about sucking on toast. Second, I want him to be like he never had your toes up. I have been. You are? She has. She's a girl, girl. So she don't pay attention to kiss, like now, here's the thing. Okay? As far as like, in terms of what it felt like, it was like tickle it, you know, so it didn't feel warm and fuzzy on the inside. 00:35:50:28 - 00:36:14:03 Unknown You weren't like, Ooh, I'm dripping wet now. But I was like, honest, so flatter that this man would suck my toes like that. That's a certain level of like, Wow, he must really like it. Yeah. To me, it's like you're resting. If you're going to put something of mine in your mouth, put my dick in your mouth. Get that motherfucking foot away from me. 00:36:14:03 - 00:36:34:29 Unknown No, I don't want my toes in a bitch mouth ever. That's my point. I know. I won't believe that I have long and a tiny, tiny hand in the soap in the fish. Maybe the fish. Women. If the baby was on show, they suck on your toes. But you've got to have them carry Dumb and Dumber. Tell me that's fucked up. 00:36:34:29 - 00:36:52:02 Unknown But I mean something serious. And he need a phase where we're good people. I mean, like a baby who can swim around for good. Said TiVo. I'm not a little baby garbage. They got to work on me to get the medium size physical going with it or not. But don't worry, guys. I don't think there's going to be people in droves that want to suck your toes leg. 00:36:52:08 - 00:37:13:02 Unknown Yeah, y'all got to worry about that. Ain't really like it has happened there. Yeah, it's like I've actually I've been walking around gas stations before and had dudes be like, girl them toes away and they're like one movie, suck on them, whatever. I'm like, Really? You're thinking that he'll be interested? Where would you look on her feet in the bus or so? 00:37:13:02 - 00:37:35:04 Unknown Sure. No, like there was there was like, all sorts of funky feet action going on and don't be a menace watching it. And the thing was in the section in his mouth. And then he like, Yeah, it was metro where the corn was just like that. But my point is, if I'm going to take that, like you say, Oh, I'm so flattered that this man put my foot in his mouth. 00:37:35:07 - 00:37:56:06 Unknown Like, would you not be more flattered as well as actually turned on if he put your big JJ in his mouth. Oh, yes, it's in that way better. Yeah, that would be more enjoyable, probably, But that's my point. If a girls like it, fine. But I mean, they'll be like, How about you suck my dick? Well, see, that's what I'm saying. 00:37:56:06 - 00:38:11:11 Unknown Like, All right, so you missionary, you got leg up right here, and a toad is come across your mouth. Put it in your mouth. What? You out of your mind? I hang on to the fucking leg for some more than average to get my policy, so I'm extra right there for extra. He is totally extra. I don't get it right. 00:38:11:18 - 00:38:44:02 Unknown I don't fucking get it right there. That's why it fucks with the threesome with to drag a load. An ankle. Yeah. An ankle. Well, kind of nice to you. That's fine, honey. I'm a little tired, you know, like I'm more flattered when duty to my ass. Not what they booty. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I. The queen is a lot bigger on a dollar day. 00:38:44:04 - 00:39:11:27 Unknown Yeah, yeah, yeah. Got all the groceries, the booty from the back. Oh, I mean, that's, like, such a compliment. Yeah. No, I like it because you can only put your tongue but so far into a booty haul. It's true. Yeah. 30 times, right. There's distinctive resistance to that keystone because there's no one in there that's like having last weeks. 00:39:11:27 - 00:39:41:02 Unknown Yeah, yeah, yeah. It holds up with. My God. Yeah. You got to give up. All of a sudden, you put in the plumbing, you had some more conversations. I would say that right now. There we go. We're just trying. Yeah. What? Once again, I'm not. I'm like, if I got kiss tongue, probably go under for JJ Dilbert hanging out with you guys? 00:39:41:04 - 00:40:21:03 Unknown Yeah, a little of the mail. Oh, so. So you got married out by you guys leaked out, huh? I need to blaze Stayin alive in the kitchen. I'm like, negative. Turned on now at this gives you right on the map. Everybody's deeply peaceful. I'm says I never really know what I'm going to get when I come on this show Come back to me. 00:40:21:03 - 00:40:48:27 Unknown Never no good microphone What you did, Jerry vow to take a commitment to invest in your barkers. Commitment to Bob Barker. Mike, I know I should have been wearing, like a cheeseburger in paradise. Yeah, that that need to be out is to not because of his music, but just the fact that Jimmy is the only motherfucker to make billions and billions of dollars. 00:40:48:27 - 00:41:16:01 Unknown Probably really all for one song to us On his entire lifestyle. He could go to Jimmy. Well, what kinds of creative lifestyle concerts we save? Every county, every every, whatever. It's the same fucking kinds of energy I things. But the fact that he I've been to thousands people just saying nonsense are it's just ridiculous. Yeah. Show after show after show, same concert, years and years and years or so. 00:41:16:03 - 00:41:40:20 Unknown I saw like 30 years, 15 and when I was like 36 and another time when I was like 38, I guess I've seen three times, right. See an exact show every time. And honestly, it's like that. It's just the vibe, like the tailgaters. They're some of the nicest fucking people like you set up cornhole, you like tailgate for super long and people are drinking punch out of random coolers like John lodges everywhere. 00:41:40:20 - 00:42:03:06 Unknown People are dancing like, it's amazing. It's amazing. Maybe I couldn't pull up my ticket like the last one that I went to. And like, there were four or five security guards, like, standing there. This is it. Like, what is the place in D.C.? Not D.C. Capital. Yeah, no, because the arena. Yes, the Capitol arena. So like trying to get it and like, I like jumped over the fans and they were like, man, bam! 00:42:03:06 - 00:42:24:09 Unknown And they're like, all right, I like please. I was like, my fans are pulling on my ticket. And they were like, It's okay, honey, go ahead. I just snuck into the Jimmy Buffett concert. Like, what? People were so nice that Jimmy Buffett fans were a lot better when they went out, especially when they would come out here. When he come out here to fucking this hour, Jimmy, what did they just want to have a good time, man. 00:42:24:09 - 00:42:43:16 Unknown They just want to have a good time in the party. Yeah, it was purely there for party, but effort bar because they don't really give to folks about music. He made a beer guy. They're like a corporate restaurant company that is everywhere. It's said I went to it in the Bahamas. Yeah. He's. He's got quite a business accouterment of what he accomplished in his life. 00:42:43:16 - 00:43:05:22 Unknown So such a badass. And shout out to that dude. Yeah, Yeah. I pull out of the same show. Yeah. You don't worry about forgetting nothing. You know, they say so as you play in your RV. A lazy general with that said, Oh yeah, I'm going to have to bring this episode of the Mason of Friends show to a close hahaha. 00:43:05:24 - 00:43:23:20 Unknown Like thank you for tuning in. Like to encourage you to listen to old episodes as well as new episodes are like share scrabbling. Jim That's right. Ring that bell and whatever the fuck else. There is to do. Follow this shit if you ever give your thumbs up some such. But yeah, you know, be nice to people that look like you. 00:43:23:20 - 00:43:41:05 Unknown Be nice people that don't look like you don't be adding a little bit smart little bitch. Ladies and gentlemen, keep moving forward. That's right. Keep grinding on the shit you're trying to get done because that is how things get done. We believe in you? That's right. Don't forget just how much we love you. Love you all, and we wish you nothing but the best. 00:43:41:06 - 00:43:50:26 Unknown All day, every day. And peace be with you. Go, God.